He shrugs. “It’s okay to question my methods. The only thing I’m telling you is that you have to go back home and sit down with her to talk about your relationship. You two act like a married couple with a child. It’s endearing, and if I was planning to have a forever relationship, I’d want what you have. However, neither one of you knows where you stand. It’s time to sit down and talk about your expectations.
“If not, you’ll be pacing like an idiot at the DMV waiting for his turn. It’s never going to come because you don’t even know why you’re there.”
“When her brother asked who Keaghan was, she couldn’t respond. I thought…I don’t know why I believed he’s ours. My son adores her, and what if one day she walks out because she finally found herself.”
Nando rolls his eyes. “That’s what I’m saying. Expectations. You call her Nat in front of the kid. If you want her to be his mother, you talk to her about that, and then you start saying, ‘Go with Mommy.’”
Beacon nods. “He’s partially right, but don’t you think you’re reading too much into the situation? What else is happening?”
“Laura called earlier today.”
All eyes are on me.
“She wants to see Keaghan.”
“That’s a change of direction. I thought she was done with him. What did you say?” Manelik asks.
“I wanted to say go to hell, fuck off, or no hablo Inglés and hang up. Somehow I had a somewhat civilized conversation with her.” I pause and look at Keaghan, who’s back with Beacon.
In a few minutes, when Nydia and Grace come back from yoga, they’re going to steal him. If Nathalie leaves, at least he’ll have his aunts around. Won’t he?
“Fish, what’s happening with Laura? Are you getting back together?” Mane’s question doesn’t surprise me. He swears I had something important with her.
“No. We’re going to have a meeting where we discuss her expectations. I don’t want to deny my son the chance to meet his mother.”
Beac cocks an eyebrow. “What about Nathalie?
“You’re fucking up, my friend,” Nando says.
“No. I’m being smart for my son. He’s the most important person in my life. My love for Nat isn’t going to change that. If she can’t be a part of us because of her career, it’s okay. Her mother uses her brother to convince her to do shit she doesn’t want to do. I bet she’s packing as we speak.”
Beacon looks at his watch, then at me. “Is that why you’ve been here for six hours?”
I nod.
Nando pats my back. “I’ll give you some free advice. Go home, talk your shit out, and make a real commitment. Saying I love you and having a weekly schedule isn’t enough. I’m not saying buy a ring and propose. Commitment means agreeing on sharing your life and knowing what to expect from one another. Assure her that she’s part of your little family, and not just your live-in girlfriend.”
“I hate to say he’s right,” Brianna says. “If you want, we can take care of Keaghan.”
I shake my head. “No. I’ll bring him home. He’s part of our little family.”
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Fisher
It’s going to be okay, I repeat as I walk back home.
But I’m fucking wrong.
As I’m approaching the house, I spot Laura. Nathalie is speaking to her. Fuck, I never wanted them to cross paths. I’m ashamed of the person I was before Nat came into my life. Part of that shame is choosing a shallow person to share my bed with because it was easier than doing one-night stands that required small talk.
The fact that Laura is in Luna Harbor sounds an alarm. I pull out my phone so I can record our conversation. Nothing good can come out of this impromptu visit.
“He’s not here, but I’ll let him know that you came to see him,” I hear Nathalie say.
“Who are you?” Laura asks, scrunching her nose. “The nanny?”
“Hey.” I rush over before she says something inappropriate to Nat. “I thought we agreed to talk later this week—in Seattle.”
“I had to see my little boy.” She reaches for Keaghan and takes him into her arms. “You’re all grown up. I missed you. Mama missed you.”
Keaghan coughs. Nathalie looks at him. “How is he doing?”
Before I answer, I notice her eyes are blotchy. Was she crying? “Are you okay?”
She nods once, which means she’s not okay.
I don’t have time for this. If she plans on leaving, I should call someone to pack her shit. I can only deal with one problem at a time.
“He shouldn’t be out in the cold,” Nathalie says, reaching for Keaghan.
Laura pushes her way inside, not allowing her to touch Keaghan. Nathalie glares at her, then at me.
“The house is cute, just like the town. It could be a vacation destination, but we should live in New York.”
What the fuck is she talking about?
“I need the powder room to retouch my makeup. I want the first pictures of the three of us to look perfect.” Laura glances at Nathalie. “You can leave. We don’t need you.”
Nathalie gives me a questioning glance.
“You can leave,” Laura repeats dismissively.
“Laura, I never agreed with your plan,” I interrupt before she fucks up my life in less than a minute. “As I said over the phone, we can discuss your requests and probably compromise on a few of those…”
“I only have one. I want the two of you back in my life.”
I take a deep breath. “Listen. I want Keaghan to be part of your life.”
“Can we change his name? I don’t think I like it. I heard the name Spanner the other day.”
Thank fuck she was too busy to figure out how to name him or my poor son would be named after…what does Spanner means? It sounds like spam mail. Fuck, this woman is insane. Why on earth did I choose her to be my steady fuck?
“We can make it a trend,” she continues. “I can see the posts already. I named my baby after Spanner, Laura and Fisher Hannigan’s child. Maybe we could try to have a daughter or adopt one. It’s a thing to at least adopt a child or two from another country.”
Keaghan starts to cry. She shoves him immediately toward Nathalie whose face is a mix of anger and horror.
“Let’s go and change you, baby,” she says, glaring at me.
“We should hire someone different to be our nanny. We could have fun with her when Keaghan is sleeping,” Laura says provocatively.
“She’s not the nanny.”
“As I was saying, we have to make a plan. We could be like those couples who never marry. Like Goldie and Kurt. Oprah and Steadman. Rosie and Jason.” She waves a hand over her head. “You could shave, like Jason. We’ll be perfect, but with a kid.”
I scrub my face with both hands. This isn’t going to work if she’s not listening to me.
“Listen. He’s not an accessory. We’re not going to post pictures of him online. His face isn’t hitting the internet tonight or any time soon. Do you understand?”