Pain flashes through his features before vanishing behind a hardened mask. “Is there something you’d like to say to me?”
My chest tingles and my eyes widen slightly. I look away and shake my head.
“Really? It sure seems like there is.”
I shake my head again.
“Go on, I’m waiting.”
I chew on the inside of my cheek. Should I say something? After what happened when he rubbed my lower back, things have been good between us but also awkward.
Should I?
“You tried to kiss me.” My heart starts pounding against my chest. I regret the words the second I speak them.
“It won’t happen again.”
“I know that.” This is so awkward. “Why did it happen in the first place?”
He shrugs. “I felt like it.”
“That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard,” I scoff, almost slamming back into my seat as he starts up the car once more.
We drive in silence for a while. He has to give me more than that. He can’t just not explain this to me.
When we pull into the driveway I ask again; I can’t help myself. He climbs out of the car, slamming the door with a bang, not even bothering to look at me or even help me out like he usually does.
“Nathan.” I say sharply and grab his arm. “Don’t walk away from me.”
“What do you want me to say?” His brown eyes narrow on my face. “You’re like a dog with a bone, just drop it. I’ve apologised. Let it go.”
“I’d like to understand.”
“Fine,” he laughs once. “You honestly want to know?” I nod slowly. “I was aroused, you were available. Nothing more and nothing less.”
A loud breath leaves me and I release his arm. “Seriously?”
“Yes.” He starts to turn. “I won’t do it again, you can be sure of that.”
“I would never do it with you anyway,” I clip and stroll past him. “Do you have any idea how wrong that is? I’m pregnant with your brother’s child. Yet you’d try and use me because you’re horny? That’s unforgivable.”
His eyes darken and he lowers his face to my ear, his presence dominating and a little frightening. “I don’t want your forgiveness.” He moves back slightly so he can see me. “You are mistaken if you think I look at you as anything more than my brother’s whore.”
My anger gets the better of me, fuelled by hurt at his words. My hand connects with his cheek, stinging my palm and instantly turning one side of his face a deep shade of pink.
“You struck me,” he whispers, his face a mask of shock.
A tear falls from my eye. “You struck me first.”
Pushing the door open I head inside and race up the stairs, wanting to put as much distance between Nathan and I as possible.
I hate him.
He doesn’t follow me which I’m grateful for. I get to cry in peace. How did this day turn out to be so bad?
His brother’s whore.
I was his brother’s fiancée. Caleb loved me and this baby.
I’ve never been called a whore in my life! I was a virgin until Caleb and even then I made him wait for it. Not that sleeping with multiple people would make somebody a whore either. I despise that word. It’s a vile, lowly, desperate attempt to insult a person.
After wallowing for a long while, I have a shower and freshen up. Powering on my laptop, I flick mindlessly through websites about babies. I should really research the whole baby thing. There’s no use putting it off and it’ll help to take my mind of the drama that is Nathan.
The doorbell rings and I hurry back down the stairs as is habit. Nathan never usually answers the door as he knows I’m closest when he’s upstairs, so I’m shocked to see him pulling it open and greeting a very attractive Lorna.
She gives me a little wave and a smile as Nathan takes her coat. Nathan looks up at me, his expression emotionless and his eyes dull. The brown in them has lost their usual sparkle.
“Hey,” Lorna grins and stops in front of me. “How are you and the bump?”
“Good.” Lies. All lies. “Yourself?”
“I’m great. We should totally go for coffee or something tomorrow. I have the day off and there aren’t many people around here that are our age.”
I’m about to say sure but Nathan cuts me off. “She can’t, she’s leaving in the morning.”
“Oh no,” Lorna says, looking as shocked as I feel. “Where are you going?”
“She’s decided her mum’s is a better option for the duration of her pregnancy.” And there is strike two. He’s just gutted me with a blunt knife. “Come on.” Nathan grips Lorna’s arm and tugs her towards the stairs.
I see he’s found his next object to relieve his arousal. Well at least he won’t be kissing me any time soon.
“That’s okay, Nathan, it won’t take me long to pack my things.” My fists clench by my sides. How can he be so heartless and mean? What did I do exactly, other than question him over his own actions? “I’ll leave now.”
“I’ll take you in the morning,” he orders, his tone clearly stating I’m not allowed to argue.
“No thanks, I’ll call my mum. I wouldn’t want you to have to suffer a three hour journey in a car with your brother’s whore.” I stomp past him. “Nice to see you again, Lorna.”
She doesn’t respond to me but I hear her whisper, “What just happened?”
“Go up to the room; I’ll be with you in a moment,” he orders and I hear his footsteps close behind me.
I push open my bedroom door and pad into the closet, my eyes tingling with the preparation of releasing tears. “You know?” I begin and pull my suitcase out, still not looking at his frame lingering in the doorway. “If you wanted me to leave, you didn’t need to be such a dick about it. I would have left if you’d asked.”
I get no response, though I feel his intense presence still lingering in the doorway despite the fact that my back is to him.
“What do you want?” Grabbing a few items, I fold them neatly and place them in the open case.
He takes a step inside and shuts the door. “Nothing.”
“Then why are you watching me?”
He sighs and pulls the door back open. “When you’re ready to apologise, I’ll be waiting.”
Me? Apologise? I’m about to shout at him when I notice that he’s left the room. Grrr. I want to slap him again.
I fill my case with the essentials and wheel it into the hall. Getting it downstairs proves to be difficult, but I manage it. My anger rises with every step.
I notice his keys on the desk near the door and snatch them without an ounce of guilt. Call me immature but I’m taking his fucking car.
I feel naughty, my heart is racing and my adrenaline is pumping. I’ve not been able to enter a car so quickly for weeks.
Spinning the car around I take off, putting my phone on charge via the console in the middle and putting as much distance between me and the house as possible. This is so bad. What am I doing?
My phone rings; it’s Nathan. I ignore it and head towards the village. I’m going to need a map if I want to make it out of here, let alone all the way home. The baby lies still which I’m grateful for. It’s irritating when he moves while I’m trying to drive.