She barks out a loud laugh. “Yeah, I heard all about it. Consider myself punished.” She giggles.
“How’s she doing?” I ask. If there’s anyone who knows and understands the depth of what Halle meant to me, it’s Kinsley.
“Better now. She won’t say it, but I know she’s glad you’re home.”
“I missed you, Kins.”
“I missed you, too, you big lug. Don’t you think about leaving again either or I’ll be hauling ass out of this town and will drag you back here with me.”
She laughs. It’s light and joking, but I don’t doubt for a second if I were to try and leave again, she really would come after me.
Despite how hard it has been for me to be back, the desire to leave again isn’t there. I know Gage would’ve wanted me home.
“Alright, everyone,” Kinsley announces, with her hands cupped around her mouth. “I have an announcement to make.”
Stepping back, I let my eyes fall around the group again, but it doesn’t take long before they fall on Halle. The moment I look at her, I’m surprised when I find hers looking back at me as if she’s been waiting for the moment I give in and look at her.
The small smile that curves the edge of her lip draws my attention down to it, making it difficult to not interrupt the announcement and pull her close to me. I don’t though, because as much as I want her, I know I don’t deserve her after all the hurt I’ve caused.
Flashing her a wink, I turn my attention to Kinsley and the tray of shot glasses on the table.
“We are all here tonight to celebrate our good friends, Callum and Ellie, on their engagement. Ellie, we are all so happy you found your way to Arbor Creek, but there is no one here more thankful than Callum. We are so happy for you both and to be a part of the big day. When we decided to get together to plan your bachelor and bachelorette parties, we knew there was no way Callum would let you go far without him being close behind.” Kinsley laughs, looking over to where Callum stands, his arm wrapped around his fiancée’s waist as his nods his head in agreement.
He leans down, whispering something in her ear. Whatever he said must’ve been only for them to hear, earning him a playful smack on his chest.
“We figured why not plan a joint party, right where it all happened. Get ready to pack your bags, people. Wes is renting us an RV and we’ll be hitting the road to Chicago.”
“Really?” Ellie smiles as tears fill her eyes, as she stares up at Callum. Everyone knows what Ellie went through before she ended up boarding a bus to move here to Arbor Creek. Something tells me with the emotion on Callum’s face, he’s thinking about their road trip here that changed everything for him.
Kinsley rushes over to her, passing between where my eyes remain locked on Halle. Out of the corner of my eye, I see her wrap her arms around Ellie’s shoulders. For the first time since I’ve returned home, I see the hurt in Halle’s eyes.
It takes me a second before I connect the dots, but not only are we going back to where Callum and Ellie first met, but we’re going to the place I took off to when I left Halle five years ago.
With her eyes on mine, she leans forward and snatches a shot of whiskey off the tray, as she raises it to me in cheers. Her eyebrow raises as the edge of her mouth covers up a sarcastic smile.
I hate the twist in my stomach, thinking about how much pain I caused her after I left. She tosses the shot back, slamming the glass down on the table. The burn stings her eyes, as the liquid lingers on her lips. Her tongue darts out, running along her lower lip, before she presses the back of her hand against her mouth.
The music surges through the speakers, drowning out everyone around us. The urge to close the distance between us and wrap my arms around her is strong. She must read my body language and the restraint I’m barely containing because she shakes her head no and it’s like a splash of ice water over my head.
Halle has never pushed me away, not when she’s hurting. Not even when there were times we were so heated from an argument, she’d never deny letting me hold her or touch her.
I can’t blame her. I don’t deserve her. I’ve pushed her away, left her here without any care to how ending us and taking off would hurt her. Watching her, she turns on her heel and takes off toward the bar. She makes it two steps before she disappears into the crowd.
“You okay?” Mason asks, I hadn’t even realized he had gotten here. Brea’s next to him with her arm wrapped around his.
“I’ll go talk to her,” Brea says, reassuringly.
“It’ll be okay, man,” Mason says, loud enough for only me to hear as he claps me on the back.
I wanted to believe him, I really did. The only thing I could think about though was the look on her face as she told me no.
As much as I’ve told myself to stay away from her, the thought of her feeling the same hits me harder than I ever expected. I’m starting to think things will never be okay with Halle and me again.
7
Halle
* * *
“I’ll have what she’s having!” Brea shouts over the music, as she slides onto the barstool next to me.
“Hey.” She smiles, bumping shoulders with me.
I look over at her, giving her the smile that matches the look I imagine I have on my face.
“Why so gloomy, pretty girl?”
“I just never expected it would be so hard to see him again. I’ve spent all this time wishing I could see him, wishing he were home. Now that he’s here, I’m reminded of how much everything has changed between us. It almost makes me wish he weren’t here again. At least I didn’t have to worry about it being thrown in my face over and over, ya know?”
Things weren’t always so easy for her and Mason. If there is anyone who can relate to how I’m feeling, it’s her. Despite them being best friends before they started dating, there was a time when she felt like his past was thrown in her face too.
“Oh, I know alright,” she says, as the bartender sets the shot glass in front of her and fills it with Jack Daniel’s.
“I’ll have another,” I mutter. I need to call it quits after this one. Drowning my sorrows in liquor won’t do me any good. If anything, it’ll loosen the seal I have on my lips, which only gets me in trouble.
We toss them back together, as I slide the empty glass across the bar to where Danny stands.
“I understand why Kinsley planned this trip. It’s perfect for Callum and Ellie, but I hate the idea of spending the weekend with Graham in the city he took off to when life got too hard for him. So hard he decided I wasn’t worth the effort anymore, so he was going to throw in the towel on us too.”
Getting it off my chest to someone feels good. Therapeutic almost. I’ve been putting on a smile for everyone around me. They have enough of their own shit. The last thing I need to do is burden them with my baggage from five years ago.
“It was hard enough thinking about who he was with and what he was doing when he was in Chicago. Now he’s back here, looking like a damn G.I. Joe, throwing it in my face how sexy he looks. I can only imagine all the women he had throwing themselves at him.”
Groaning, I rub my hand over my forehead. That last shot was probably not a good idea.