“The pump?”
“Yeah. It looks like a torture device for your poor breasts. I hate that you’d have to use it,” his scrunched face softened to a flirtatious smirk. “But whenever you do need to use it, I can always kiss them better. Give them a little TLC.”
Audrey grunted in displeasure when my chest shook with laughter. “You’re horrible,” I tried to admonish him, but really, color stained my cheeks at the thought, and my chest filled with happiness that he still found me attractive enough to even make sexual comments about. “Well, they were made to withstand the torture to feed her.”
“But later, when she’s done with them next year, they’re all mine, right?”
I didn’t answer and instead rolled my eyes. I did that a lot around him, but it usually came with a smile too.
Ian got up and headed to the bathroom to get ready for work, and I was left smiling, thinking about his words.
Later. Next year.
I didn’t want to dwell on him being around that long. We hadn’t even talked about next week. There was a part of me that still held him at arm’s length, fearful of relying on someone like I had with Jake—a part of me that still saw Ian as the playboy when we first met. But that part grew smaller each day, and the more time I spent around him, the more the thought of him being around filled me with excitement and had me repeating the words in my head.
Later.
Yeah, I liked the sound of later.
Not that he needed to know that I liked anything that came out of his mouth. I had to make sure his head could still fit through the door.
15 Ian
It took two weeks before she finally let me take Audrey to work.
And, holy shit, I regretted it almost instantly, rethinking keeping her there. It was like she could sense my weakness and cried unless I held her. Then, I remembered how tired Carina looked this morning when she finally caved and agreed to rest for a few hours. She told me she’d come get Audrey at lunch and then her eyes closed before I even walked out.
That left me with a tiny human strapped to my chest as I bounced my way through a phone conference. Hell, I bounced all the time, even when I wasn’t holding her. Erik caught me bouncing the other day while I looked over spreadsheets. He’d quirked a brow, shaking his head with a laugh as he walked away.
Both guys gave me shit. Jared spent the morning laughing at me as I struggled to move without waking Audrey. I didn’t think he’d ever stop laughing when he caught me baby-talking. I’d flipped him off and continued talking to my girl. Ain’t no shame in baby-talking to the most beautiful girl ever.
By the time lunch rolled around, I almost collapsed in relief when Erik held up a bag from our favorite sub place. “Lunch in your office? You’ve got that baby bouncer in there, right?”
My face lit up, remembering the chair Carina promised was magic. I pulled Audrey off me with a groan, my front a little sweaty from where she’d been resting all morning. Gently placing her in the seat, I sent up a tiny prayer to the heavens that she didn’t wake up. Her face screwed up, and she grunted a little, but when I began bouncing the seat, she settled again.
Just like magic.
“Damn, I don’t know how Carina did this for the last few months,” I complained, stretching my back before plopping down in my chair.
“Because she’s a hell of a lot stronger than you.”
I scowled, but then shrugged. “You’re not wrong.”
“I rarely am.”
Scoffing, I threw my sandwich wrapper at his head, which he easily dodged. “God,” I groaned. “This sub tastes like heaven after all the calories I burned bouncing her. My quads are gonna be feeling it tomorrow. No wonder Carina has such phenomenal legs.”
“Can’t say I’ve looked since I stare at Alex all the time.”
“Alexandra’s got some great legs too. I’ve looked at hers plenty of times.”
I was barely holding back my laugh before the wrapper hit me in the head. Erik was so easy and protective of Alex. I liked getting a rise out of him.
“So, how has the last month been?”
“Good. Exhausting, but good. Every time I feel like I might face plant from lack of sleep, I look at her tiny face, and it’s all worth it.”
“She’s pretty damn cute.”
“Of course she is. She’s my kid. How could she not be the best-looking baby there ever was.”
“How does Carina put up with you?”
“I think she’s secretly in love with me,” I said with a wink. “She at least likes to look at my body and who could blame her.”
Erik groaned and rolled his eyes. I had that effect on a lot of people. “How are things going with you two? You stay there, don’t you? Are you guys…together?”
“No, we’re not together-together. But things are going well. We’re a team.” I thought of how to explain it and realized I wasn’t sure because we never talked about it. “A team that never talked about how to be a team, but we’re making it work.”
“So, you’ve never sat down and talked to her?” Erik said, slowly. His scrunched face was a mix of confusion, and doubt and it kind of pissed me off.
“No.”
“Ian, how the hell have you been with this woman for two months—basically living on her couch for three weeks as you raise your child with her—and you haven’t talked about what’s next?”
I scowled at his logic and ran a hand through my hair. “I don’t know. Jesus. Things have been crazy, and we’ve just…fuck, I don’t know.”
He laughed, and I thought of lobbing something sharper at his head. “What do you want?”
“I don’t know.” I sounded like a broken record.
He gave me a doubtful stare. Erik knew me better than anyone; he’d been my best friend since we were kids. “Yes, you do.”
I tried to hold his stare, but Erik was better at being a hard-ass than I was. “Fine. I want her,” I almost shouted, throwing my hands up. Audrey stirred in her seat, and I quickly bounced her again until she quieted down.
“Was that so hard?”
“Yes. Happy?”
“A little,” he admitted with a smirk.
“Don’t gloat. It looks bad on you.”
“Nothing looks bad on me, and you know it.” He laughed at my scowl but sobered. “Talk to her, Ian.”
“I know, it’s just been crazy, and I’m just trying to be as helpful as I can without getting in her way.”
“She isn’t your parents, Ian,” Erik said, nailing the issue on the head. “She’s your partner in this and if you want more from her, then talk to her. Let her know.”
I tried to swallow past the knot of nerves strangling my throat. Carina laughed when I made jokes, but she also glared a lot. It was fifty-fifty on the reaction I’d get from her. What would her reaction be when I told her I wanted more from her? And what kind of more did I want?
“Yeah, I’ll think on it.”
“Good. And on that note, I have a phone call to make.”
Erik stood and headed out, opening the door to Hanna about to knock on the other side, her fist raised in the air. He gave her a quick hug and explained his meeting before walking away.