“We are family, Cordae. It’s unfortunate that you don’t agree with us.” Bonoto stands adjusting his jacket when I hear shots being fired. Straight through my shoulder, I feel the burn. My stance doesn’t falter, though. I see all of the men with their guns drawn, aimed at me. Is this the way I was meant to go? In a bloodbath of the families?
“We won’t allow you to ruin what we’ve set in motion, Cordae. You Vitale men have taken far more than your share for a long time.” Gonzo looks dead serious as he looks me in the eye.
“You’ve always been the weak link, Gonzo. Since my uncle held his place, you were beneath him. You never liked that, did you?” He huffs before adjusting his gun in his hand.
“It’s unfortunate, yes, but not on my end.” Whistling, the rest of my guys move in from the back. They quickly overtake the three men that stood guard. The men’s eyes dart around as that familiar look of fear creeps over their features. A smile tugs at my mouth as I take in the scene in front of me.
“Fine. You win Vitale. We will agree to your terms.” Bonoto turns to face me now. I shake my head. That isn’t good enough for me.
“I didn’t realize I offered a negotiation. As far as I’m concerned, you and your families are disposable. You aren’t needed, nor do you do us any good.” Aiming my gun at Bonoto’s head, he shakes his, raising his hands in defeat.
“Cordae, we knew your uncle. You grew up with us.” Is that begging? I fucking hate begging. Did he think that throwing in my uncle would detour me from what I really want?
“My uncle is no longer with us as you all know. I am the deciding factor. You were nothing to me growing up and you are nothing but a thorn in my side now. You work under false pretenses, and I’m afraid I’ve given you a false sense of security.” Pulling the trigger, I watch his body fall to the floor. I should regret what I’m doing. I should feel something for taking their lives, but I don’t. The men move for their guns when I stop them.
“Tsk Tsk. I tried to be reasonable, did I not? Your families are dragging us down. I regret that this is the end of the line for you. I truly wish that you would have been more understanding.” Moving from man to man, I shoot them all, watching them fall to the floor.
I hear three more shots and know that Romero took out the last of the men that were in the building. I stand still as I take in the scene before me. Nikolai places his hand on my shoulder before I glance over at him.
“Being the Boss isn’t easy as you know. It takes a strong man but even stronger heart to move his family forward.” His words hang in the air as he turns to leave the building. I stand there for a few more minutes taking in what I’ve done. I can only hope that I made the right choices here.
The Bratva won’t be moving in on us.
Chapter 40
As soon as we stopped, I was out of the car and in the house. I hit the stairs, taking them two at a time until I got to my office. Closing the door behind me, I head toward my desk. I pull out the bottle of bourbon, not bothering with a glass. This night hasn’t gone as planned. I was so hopeful that they would offer to take me up on my end of the deal but there was always that lingering voice saying they wouldn’t. There were several people that played key parts in my life growing up. The three men that I murdered tonight were the majority of them. I don’t know how to deal with the newfound feelings that Ava has set off inside of me. This is part of the reason why I didn’t want her around. Taking another long pull from the bottle, I relish the burn. I need that now.
I need the haze that only the alcohol can give me. For the first time in my life, I’m actually thinking about the goddamn kill. I’ve never let it affect me. I’ve always taken that life and moved on as if it never occurred.
I drink until my vision blurs. The more the room seems to tip, the better. The door opens and I honestly don’t care if Nikolai or Jordy comes in here to bitch at me. I need this reprieve. I’m losing myself. I’m losing sight of who the hell I am. I’m not me. I’ve become weak.
“Are you okay?” Ava’s voice swarms me. It resonates itself deep inside of me.
“No.” The answer is truth. I’m not okay.
“What can I do?” She comes closer as the room spins. I’m lost in all that is wrong.
“Disappear.” The word comes out as a whisper from my lips. I didn’t mean them. I know in my heart that I didn’t. The darkness is sucking me deeper into its depths, and there is no way that I can pull myself out of it.
“I won’t let you push me away, Cord.” Looking up, I catch her gaze. So beautiful, yet oblivious to the world around her.
“I know you won’t.”
Her hands are on my shoulders before I can push them away. I want to push her away. The demon within me wants to push her away.
“You’re only getting yourself deeper in this.” The world sways but I don’t care. She’s going to hear every last thing I have to say right now.
“Talk to me.” Her words are meant to soothe me, to help me, but they don’t. They rip at me, tearing me apart.
“I’ve taken so many lives that I shouldn’t have. Even tonight, I took some of the people that have known me since I was born.” The silence grows in the room. My heart hammers in my chest as I keep trying to keep her at arm’s length.
“Cold blooded murderer. I kill, I take what I want. Much like I took you. I wanted you, Ava. I wanted everything good that you had inside of you. I fucking ripped that all away from you. I instilled the darkness that haunts you at night. I replaced your light with my dark. I ruined you.” My drunken self is letting all the walls crumble around us. She is going to get a glimpse of the man that she has come to love.
“Cord.” My name leaves her mouth, but I shake my head. I’m not finished.
“I thought that I had found something in you, something good. I needed it. I wanted it. You came into my world and tipped it over. You were nothing I needed, but everything I wanted. My world was lost after you and Amelia. I thought I could make it the way I was. I slowly lost myself. I don’t know who I am anymore, Ava.” She moves around to stand in front of me before leaning down. Catching my face in her hands, she holds me there.
“You are Cordae Vitale. You are an amazing man, a fearless leader. You rule your own empire. You make the rules. You can’t change your feelings as much as you don’t like them. One day, Cord, you are going to have to be true to yourself. You are going to have to admit to your feelings before it’s too late, and there will come a day, when it’s too late.” She’s right. I don’t know when she came to know so much, but I know that she’s right.
“I can’t say it when I’m sober yet because I’m afraid of what will happen if I do. Right now though, in this moment, I can. I can tell you that I love you more than my own life. I’d die in place of you. I’d take away all your pain just to see you smile. You are everything to me, and I can’t fucking understand how that happened.” Her eyes sparkle with tears. I know this needs to be done. All the things need to be said.
“I love you, too. I would die for you, Cord. You mean everything to me whether you believe it or not.” Grabbing her face with one hand, I pull her around the waist with the other, pulling her closer to me.