She froze, speechless.
“Unless of course you want to give your son to him to raise instead.”
“Are you insane? I will never give up my baby!”
He disregarded her protest, his eyes crazed.
“And if he doesn’t want him, there’s always adoption, then we can make our own—” His arms fastened onto the wall on both sides of her, pinning her in.
“—No, that’s not happening Logan! You are not going to trick me into believing you want a family, just like that, out of the blue after all these years! I will never give Alex up, ever and If that's your plan, you better let me go!” Her voice rose to a frantic, hysterical pitch.
“You're not going anywhere! If you try to leave me again you will regret it!”
Her eyes fell on his hands clenched into fists. In a blind rage, his arm rose. She cringed.
Stop, calm down! Stepping back and blinking rapidly, he shook his head over and over as if seeking clarity that refused to come. “Never mind that now. I know you need to rest.” A strange, faraway look filled his eyes as he withdrew his hands and gently brushed strands of hair out of her face. Their eyes locked. He broke the stare, walking slowly away.
Stunned, her mouth dropped as she watched him leave. In a panic, she rushed onto the balcony and called Alicia. They arranged to meet in front of the building.
* * *
“What am I gonna do?” She couldn't hide the desperation in her voice.
The sun was sinking in the sky, creating a brilliant orange glow across the horizon. She tried to still the shaking by concentrating on the soothing coolness of the sand sifting between her toes. It didn’t work.
Alicia observed her. “I would get the hell out of there right away if I were you. Did you ever call Jake?”
Kristen rolled her eyes. “No. I was too confused. I think I was hoping for a miracle, wishing somehow things would go right with Logan, but now I know…” With a disgruntled huff, she shook her head in resignation. “He's back to his old tricks acting really weird and screwed up all over again.”
“No kidding. That's normal to him. It was just a matter of time.” She frowned. “You have to call Jake, Kris—it's his son. Give him a chance, maybe he'll come up with a plan and help you out. If you keep lying to him...”
Jake only said he would never let Logan raise Alex if he was his. He never promised we would work it out together did he? What if he doesn’t want me anymore?
“Kristen! Snap out of it! This is serious!”
Startled, her eyes widened. “I know, it's just so, so final,” she grumbled as Jake’s words faded from her mind. Everything seemed so ridiculous, she couldn’t stand it and had to turn away.
“It has to be. Come on sweetie, you need to end this once and for all! Forget him! He's gonna bring you down really hard this time.”
Kristen pouted, no longer strong enough to argue.
“You know I'm right, then?”
When Kristen brought her eyes up to Alicia’s they were red and filled with anguish. “He started to get really crazy. He's not gonna make it easy for me to leave him Alicia.”
“What? You mean divorce-wise?” Alicia sat on the edge of the bench now, her eyes wide.
“I mean in general. I couldn't tell if he meant it or not. I'm really getting freaked out. If I tell Jake... I don't want either of them to get hurt. I mean physically.”
Alicia's mouth fell open. “Holy shit. Is Logan threatening you or Jake?”
Kristen took a long, deep breath. “Kind of.” A sudden feeling that they were being watched came over her. She quickly looked back.
“You can't keep living like this, Kristen. Does he know where you are now?”
“No. I just left the house.” As if on cue, her phone beeped. A text from Logan. “He's looking for me,” she said as her face grew sullen.
“You better answer it. Don't set him off. You have to play his game, make your plans, and get away. If anyone gets hurt, let it be him, not you or Alex.”
She’s right. Kristen texted back telling him she was outside with Alicia, hoping that would keep him away.
“Call Jake, right now!” Alicia urged. “Come on, just do it!”
“Okay, okay,” she dialed him, too exhausted to worry about what she'd say.
* * *
Jake fumbled for his key, groaning. It slipped through his fingers clattering to the floor. Cursing under his breath he retrieved it, grabbing his phone just before it stopped ringing.
“Hey Kris. I just came back from a run. Are you okay?” The loud background noise made it difficult to hear her. “Are you outside?” He finally unlocked the door, pushed it open with his foot and entered the apartment.
“Yeah, I'm at the beach with Alicia.” She hesitated. Alicia nudged her.
“What's going on? How's the baby?” The bad vibes creeped up on him, making him anxious. He strode to window, his eyes vacant as he peered outside. Something is wrong.
“Tell him,” Alicia whispered.
“Who's that?” His eyes narrowed at the sound of an indiscernible voice.
“Jake. I had the baby a few days ago...” She couldn't continue.
“What? Why didn't you call me right away, is everything all right?”
“Yes, but I had an emergency delivery. A C-section.”
Jake held his breath, falling onto a chair. “And…” the words were lost in his throat. He closed his eyes, bracing for the worst.
Kristen, gulped, glancing at Alicia for moral support. She gave her an enthusiastic nod. “And, he is your son, I’m sure of it. I'm sorry, I was recovering and couldn't call you.”
Jake flew out of the seat, his hand wildly grabbing his head. The phone slipped out of his hand; he saved it just in time. “Wow! Really, are you sure, how can you tell?”
“He looks exactly like you, that’s how!” Tears of joy streamed down her face. Alicia slipped her arm around her shoulders.
For a few seconds he was speechless. All she could hear was his harsh breathing. He’s not happy!
Kristen’s heart pounded.
“Jake…aren’t you gonna say something—are you happy?” She gave Alicia a helpless look. Alicia’s brow creased in confusion.
“Of course I’m happy—I don't know what to say! Are you? Where is he?” Unable to think clearly, he marched across the living room.
“Yes! He's so gorgeous! You have to see him, baby!”
“I will, I will. Is he with you now? Are you going back to his apartment?”
As he calmed down a little the questions bombarded him; they flustered her.
“No, the baby’s fine…but since he was born prematurely the doctor wants to keep him a few more days.”
Speechless again, the weakness in his knees sank him to the floor. “But he's healthy right?” Afraid of the answer, he squeezed his eyes blocking out the light.
“Yes, it’s just procedure.” Sensing she had to reassure him, she rushed to continue, getting more and more energized as she spoke. “He's really big too, and really strong, just like his daddy. He almost broke my fingers!” She laughed, whisking away the tears with her fingers.