“No, Delaney. You know that’s not what I meant.”
I knew she didn’t, but right now, I just wanted to be a miserable bitch. I was miserable on the inside so I might as well make everyone around me miserable.
“Jay is going to take you home. Just let him take care of you, honey. You need that right now.”
I shook my head. “Jay doesn’t want me anymore.”
“Delaney, you know that’s not true.”
But wasn’t it true? Wasn’t the baby the whole reason Jay had been with me in the first place. Would he have really given me a second chance to be with him if I had just shown up at the party telling him I wanted a second shot with him?
He would have laughed at me and headed off to bed with some other chick.
I wasn’t special anymore. I didn’t have something he wanted that no one else had.
I was back to being a babe just like all of the other women who had been in his bed.
“You gotta talk, Delaney. You can’t keep this all inside.” God, Mave was such a good person, and here I was just being a bitch. I couldn’t help it, though. I couldn’t find the right words to speak right now. I just said what I felt.
“Can I please go home now?” That was all I wanted.
I just wanted to go home, sleep, and pretend my life wasn’t shattered into a million pieces..
*
Jay
Mave had said she was talking, but she didn’t speak a word to me.
By the time I was back in the room with her, she was fully dressed and sitting on the edge of the bed signing papers.
Leelee and Kurt had stayed with me the whole time while Delaney slept. Once she had woken and we had gotten the go-ahead that she was good to leave, they went back to their hotel to get a few hours of sleep. Leelee had said they would be over after they checked out of their hotel, but I wasn’t sure that was going to be a good idea.
Delaney had let me help her get in and out of the SUV, but once we had gotten into the house, she had climbed the stairs and shut the bedroom door behind her.
The house was eerily silent, and I sat in the living room trying to figure out what the hell I was supposed to do.
It had only been about two weeks since I found out about the baby, but it felt like my heart had been ripped out when the doctor told us it was gone.
The sob Delaney had let out would forever haunt me. The miscarriage hadn’t been her fault. The doctor explained that sometimes these things just happened this way.
That didn’t make things any easier.
We both had wanted this baby and were planning to build our lives around it.
Now, it was gone in an instant.
A knock sounded on the door, but I didn’t get up.
I didn’t want to talk to whoever was at the door. I didn’t want to explain what the doctor had said. I didn’t want to think about the fact that the little family I thought I had been building was down to just two.
“Jay,” I heard shouted through the door.
Leelee.
I should have known even though I had told Leelee I would call her if I needed her, that she would come if she wanted.
“Open the damn door,” she shouted.
I numbly walked to the front door and pulled it open.
Leelee and Kurt stood there with Remy, Harlyn, Frankie, and Brooks behind them.
“I told you assholes to wait for me.” And Roc was walking up the sidewalk.
The whole gang was here, even my boss.
Why?
Leelee pushed past me and everyone followed her in.
I noticed everyone was carrying plastic bags in the hands. “What is going on?” I asked.
Roc was the last one in the door, and he was carrying a watermelon. “Leelee let us know what was going on, and we came to let you know we’re here for you.”
My eyes dropped to the floor, and I nodded. “Thanks, Roc,” I choked out.
“Anything for you. You know the crew is a family, Jay.” He followed everyone into the kitchen, and I closed the door.
I looked up at the ceiling and shut my eyes.
Life fucking sucked, but at least I had my friends and family to help pick up the pieces. I just wished Delaney would let me in.
It was all going to take time.
*
Chapter Twenty-Two
Delaney
“Mama?”
“Delaney?”
I squeezed my eyes shut and willed the tears to stop falling. “Mama, I need you.”
*
Chapter Twenty-Three
Jay
In times of pain and sorrow, food was what was used for comfort.
While everyone waited for Delaney to wake up, Leelee, Frankie, and Harlyn all gathered in the kitchen to make lunch, and then dinner.
Around five, Meg, Lo, Cyn, and Rigid showed up. They had known what was going on but didn’t want to overwhelm Delaney or me. Meg had called around four asking Remy if he thought it was okay if they stopped by, and I told him it was fine.
“Has she came down at all?” Lo asked.
I was standing by the stairs and shook my head. “We got home, and she just went upstairs. Leelee took up some soup earlier but she had said she was still sleeping.”
“You’ll be okay, kid. I know it doesn’t seem like it right now, but you’re a strong kid.”
I barely knew Lo except for a few short conversations we had when they had come to visit Remy. I knew he was a good guy from the way Remy talked about him, and his words actually gave me comfort. “Thanks, Lo.”
Meg walked past us and stepped a foot on the stairs.
“Babe, where the hell are you going?” Lo grabbed her hand and pulled her down.
“I’m going up to talk to Delaney,” she said simply.
“Babe, come on. This isn’t a time for one of your crazy stunts,” Lo said quietly.
She rolled her eyes and shook off his hold. “I know, Lo. I’m not an idiot. I’m just gonna see if she needs anything.”
“You good with that?” Lo asked me.
I didn’t know what was good to do. I wanted to barge into her room and crawl into to bed with her, but I didn’t because I didn’t want to hurt her any more than she was. “Just let her sleep if she’s still out.”
Meg reached up and patted my cheek. “Of course, doll.” She slowly marched up the steps, and she disappeared out of view as she moved to Delaney’s room.
I didn’t know if letting Meg up there was the best idea, but right now, I had no idea what to do. Maybe Meg could work some of her crazy magic and help heal Delaney even just a little bit.
*
Delaney
The door opened, and I was surprised to see Meg.
“Hi, honey,” she whispered. She shut the door behind her and stood at the foot of the bed. “I hope it’s okay I came up.”
I didn’t care what she did.
“We’re all downstairs worried sick about you.”
“I’m fine,” I croaked.
She sat down on the bed and brushed my hair back from my face. “No, you’re not. But it’s okay that you’re not.”
I closed my eyes and sighed. “I just hurt right now.”