I laughed. ‘I think, given the café’s location and Sascha’s support so far, that’s pretty much a given.’ At that moment, as if she could tell we were talking about her, she raised her head and gave me and her father a quick wave. The free cupcakes had gone down well and I was pleased to see that plenty of people had bought drinks. It was good to see her support being paid back.
Adam and I agreed to talk more and I moved on to find Ava quietly hoovering up the leftover cupcakes, looking a little flushed. ‘You’ll be sick if you eat too many.’
‘I think I ate too many already. My tummy hurts.’ Her lower lip wobbled. I scooped her up onto my hip, hoping that she wouldn’t throw up down my shoulder.
‘Oh, sweetie, that was silly.’
‘But they were yummy.’
‘They were. How many did you have?’ I bit my lip; I really should have kept a closer eye on her.
‘Only two… maybe three.’ When I raised a silent eyebrow, she held up one hand extending all her fingers and amended it to, ‘P’raps five.’
I swallowed down the laugh bubbling in my throat at the honest jump to five and gave her sturdy little body a hug, even though my own stomach recoiled at the thought of that much sugar. Burying my head in her curls, I dropped a kiss on her head, a surge of love making my heart burst. The cupcakes might be small but they had a good wodge of buttercream on the top. No wonder she felt a bit sick.
Hilda materialised at my elbow like my very own Mary Poppins with Poppy at her side. ‘Ava’s not feeling too good,’ I said. ‘She’s got tummy ache. Too much sugar.’
Poppy rolled her eyes and muttered something like, ‘Serves her right.’
I raised a pointed eyebrow. Poppy smiled sweetly. ‘It’s nice here. It reminds me of the place Grandad takes us to for ice cream in the Valley Gardens.’
‘Don’t talk about ice cream,’ cried Ava. ‘Don’t feel well.’
‘And a late night, I shouldn’t wonder,’ said Hilda with a smile, lifting a hand to Ava’s rosy cheeks. ‘But she’s got good colour. Not grey or green. I think she’ll be all right. Perhaps some fresh air will help. Shall I take her outside for a little while? It’s getting a bit stuffy in here.’
It was unlike Hilda to complain and I realised that her face was a little pale and her eyes not as bright as usual. Because of her sheer energy, I often forgot she was actually quite elderly. ‘It’s probably time we wound things up. Between us, I think we’ve chatted to most people.’
‘Certainly have, and everyone has signed up.’ Her face brightened for a second but I could tell she was very tired. It was definitely time to take her home. I caught Ash’s eye and, like a parent, gave a discreet nod towards Ava, Poppy, and Hilda. Immediately getting the message, he nodded and began to wind up his conversation
‘Amazing turn out.’ Ash came to my side as I glanced around the room, still not quite able to believe the numbers of people who had turned up. For a moment, I felt a little overwhelmed by the outpouring of goodwill and support that everyone had exhibited. It was totally heart-warming.
‘I think we’re really going to make this happen, Hilda.’
‘Well, of course we are. Was it ever in doubt?’
Chapter Twenty-Seven
There was a rustle of feathers as Poppy threw herself onto the bed again, all moody teenager with sprawling, lethargic limbs.
‘So, is Ash your boyfriend?’ she asked, her eyes measured in the reflection in the mirror as I started to apply my make‐up.
‘We’re friends,’ I said, keeping my answer deliberately non‐committal and short. I wasn’t about to elaborate to a ten-year-old.
‘Why’s he taking you out to dinner?’
Phew, that was an easy one. ‘To say thank you. I helped him get a job interview. And we’ve got lots of things to discuss about the parkrun after last night. Didn’t our meeting go well?’
I was still on a high. After counting up all the people who had signed up last night, we had over forty volunteers.
Unfortunately, Poppy wasn’t that easily distracted and I could almost feel her weighing up the next question.
‘He likes you.’ It was said with a tiny bit of accusation.
‘He likes Hilda.’ I carried on applying my make‐up, refusing to make eye contact with the hard stare I could see in my peripheral vision. ‘He likes you. He likes Ava.’
‘You know what I mean. He watches you when he thinks no one else is looking. Don’t you like him?’
‘He’s my friend. Of course I like him.’
She let out a heavy sigh and kicked her legs restlessly against the duvet. ‘I’m not a baby. I know how things work. We’ve had our sex-education lessons. I know what sex is.’
What do I say to that? Yeah, okay, I can’t wait to jump his bones. Somehow, I was pretty sure it was not the done thing to admit to a ten-year-old that sex had been on my mind quite a lot for the last few days.
‘That’s a big jump,’ I said. ‘Ash and I are going out to dinner.’
‘Mummy had a boyfriend.’
‘Did she?’ I turned in surprise.
Poppy wrinkled her face. ‘Yeah, he was called Jonathon. He smelled funny. They used to do yoga together and she texted him all the time.’
Jon, Jonathon. Suddenly, a few things dropped into place. Wasn’t he the guy that had invited her to the retreat?
I watched as she rolled off the bed and ambled out of my room. As soon as she was out of sight, I quickly opened the dressing-table drawers. A set of black lingerie lay on top of my pile of underwear in readiness… long-overdue readiness. I’d it bought online the Sunday I’d left Ash’s flat. Checking the door, I pulled it shut, praying she didn’t come back. Since the packed lunch breakthrough – she’d made lunch every day for me – Poppy had been like a faithful shadow, and often, as I’d been working at the kitchen table this week while she watched Hollyoaks, I would find her thoughtful gaze on me.
The lingerie whispered across my skin as I slipped it on, deliciously decadent, reminding me that I was an adult again. No responsibilities for the next twelve hours. Hilda was staying over so I didn’t have to come home until the wee small hours. And until then, I had no one else to worry about but me. No one to judge me. No one to please but me.
I stared at myself in the mirror. Was this how Alice felt? I bit my lip suddenly, realising how she must have felt. I would never condone what she’d done but for that brief moment, I almost understood.
But I wasn’t going to feel guilty about Alice.
Tonight was my night. It felt as if I had this one illicit window that gave me permission to cram in as much as I possibly could.
And that meant sex. Sex with Ashwin Laghari. He was, I’d discovered in the last twenty-four hours, the master of flirty, innuendo-laden texting.
With a little shiver of anticipation, I pulled out the new little black dress that I’d also ordered online and had delivered to the office. I’d wanted to wear the same outfit as I had on our first date but unfortunately it was too big. The weight I’d lost had come back on but I felt fitter and a lot healthier, which was probably down to new muscle tone developed by all the running.