It might not surprise you to know that he and I have hardly spoken since our last encounter. Shelby has been frantically busy with his last week of panto and getting prepared for his move to Los Angeles. I’ve been rushed off my feet here. But it’s all excuses. You can find time for the one you love if you want to. In truth, the bonds have been broken and, though I am terribly sad that this didn’t work out, I feel it’s the right thing for both of us.
‘Come on, Molly Dolly Daydream,’ Bev says. ‘Snap out of it. There are three trays of roast spuds ready and waiting to be dished up.’
‘Right.’ I pull myself out of my reverie and set to with my big spoon, doling out a few of Bev’s golden, crispy potatoes onto each plate. Jess follows behind me with the veg and Alan adds a slice of nut roast and finishes with a flourish of gravy before Lucas serves the plates to the table. There are dishes of cranberry and bread sauce on the table.
It’s hot work in the kitchen and Bev wipes her brow with her forearm before puffing out a breath. She and Alan were in here early this morning getting all the veg peeled and prepped for the hungry hordes. She looks over her shoulder at me. ‘Where’s that flipping Hot Mayor when we need him?’
‘On his way up to see his family by now, I think.’
‘It’s a shame he’s not here.’
‘Yes.’ I can only agree with that. He’s been a good friend and great help over the last few weeks and I miss him more than I thought I would.
With a concerted effort, we get the dinners out to everyone while they’re still hot.‘Last few. Here you go, Jess. One for you too, Alan.’ Then Bev pushes a plate at me. ‘You’re done here, Mols. You take yours now.’
‘You’ve got one too?’
‘Last one. Perfect portioning, if I do say so myself.’
‘You’re a wonder,’ I agree.
So I take my plate and go out from the kitchen into the tea room. And, as I go to take my place at the head of the table, I stop in my tracks. The sight before me takes my breath away. Lucas has switched on LED candles and fairy lights, which are threaded all along the table. The Christmas tree, lights shining out, stands proudly in the corner. All our students are laughing and chatting together, pulling crackers, tucking into their lunch. It’s a beautiful, festive moment. They look so happy here that it brings a lump to my throat. Sometimes they can be challenging, positively difficult and, on occasion, outright awkward little buggers, but I love all of our kids so dearly and I can’t tell you how glad I am that, here at Hope Farm, we can make such a difference to their lives. Some are going to spend time at loving homes over Christmas, some less so, and I know that I will worry about them until we open again in January and they’re safely back in our fold.
Bev comes out of the kitchen with her own dinner in hand. As she passes me, she touches my shoulder and gives me a wink. I know that she’s thinking the same thing as I am.
‘Right,’ she shouts. ‘Tuck in, everyone! Don’t let your lunch get cold!’
She takes her seat next to Alan and I also notice that Lucas has pulled up his chair next to Penny which makes me smile. That’s nice. He’s not mentioned Aurora since our ‘big talk’ and I hope that it means his broken heart is beginning to heal.
Glancing out of the window, I see that it’s started to snow. Great flakes fall in lazy circles to brush against the windows.
‘Look! Snow!’ Asha says. ‘It’s snowing.’
Everyone cranes their necks to look outside, then they start to clap and cheer.
A white Christmas. What could be better? I take a deep breath and feel a rush of festive warmth right down to my toes. This is how Christmas should be. Then I raise my glass of perfectly poured sparkling clementine juice and hold it high.
‘Merry Christmas, everybody!’ I say.
And when their shining faces turn back to me and say, ‘Happy Christmas, Molly!’ it’s all I can do not to cry.
Chapter Eighty-One
The hedges are already tipped with white when Lucas and I – plus all the dogs – are waving all the students off after our lovely Christmas lunch. It’s still snowing steadily and I catch a few flakes on my hands.
‘We’ll see you on Boxing Day,’ I say to Penny and her mum. ‘Hopefully, the lanes will still be passable. If not we’ll get the tractor out and come to get you.’
‘Thanks for everything, Molly,’ Jess says. ‘It’s been a brilliant day.’
‘Take care.’ We hug each other and I note that Lucas and Penny exchange a shy glance which warms my heart.
‘Have you enjoyed it too, Penny?’
‘Yeah,’ she says, but her eyes never leave Lucas.
I give them a dozen fresh eggs to take with them as Jack didn’t let me forget he needed to collect them.
Alan and Bev are the last to leave. I hug them both. ‘You two lovebirds have a wonderful first Christmas together.’
‘We’ll be round in time for lunch on Boxing Day and I’ll bring a few bits.’ Bev looks worried to be leaving us for a day to our own devices. ‘You and Lucas will be OK by yourselves?’
‘Yeah, yeah.’ I turn to Lucas. ‘We’ll be fine, won’t we?’
‘Just the two of us snowed in together in a caravan.’ Lucas rolls his eyes. ‘Can’t think of anywhere I’d rather be.’
That makes me laugh.
‘We’ll survive,’ I assure Bev. ‘I promise you.’
Bev still looks concerned. ‘No word from Shelby.’
‘Not as yet,’ I say. ‘But that’s fine too.’
‘Shitbag,’ is Bev’s verdict. ‘I can’t believe he’s going away at Christmas.’
I shrug. ‘Hollywood calls, you drop everything and run. So I’m told.’
‘Huh.’ Bev is still not impressed by this.
‘Seriously, don’t worry about us. We’re happy.’ I look to Lucas for his endorsement.
‘Delirious,’ he agrees.
‘You know where we are if you need us,’ Bev says.
‘I do.’ I kiss her again. She and Alan climb into their car and, despite my many assurances, I feel like crying as I watch them drive away. My eyes fill with tears and I brush them away with hands already damp with snowflakes.
In a world first, Lucas puts his arm round my shoulders and says, ‘We will be all right, you know.’
‘We will. I just feel ridiculously teary. Today was a lovely day and it’s made me all emotional.’
Lucas gives an exaggerated sigh. ‘I suppose that you’ll want to go and see how all the animals are and then take a stupidly long walk across the fields with the dogs even though it’s frigging snowing.’
I laugh through my tears. ‘That sounds like a very good idea.’
‘I suppose you’ll want me to come with you.’
‘I’d like that.’
He tuts and puffs, ‘Some things never change.’
But I can tell he doesn’t mean it.
Lucas and I go to the barn and do a tour of the animals. Instantly, my melancholy is lifted, my soul soothed. The alpacas are all present and correct, straw sticking out of their mad pom-pom hair, contentedly humming in unison. How can you stay cross or upset with these guys around? The animals are constant and have no care for whatever drama might be occurring in our lives. They just want food and attention. I stroke Johnny Rotten’s neck and he tries to have a sly nip at my elbow. All is as it should be.