By the time I drifted off to sleep, I’d almost convinced myself I was in love.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Griffin
I screwed up with Avery. I came on too strong. I wanted to do something nice for her, not realizing it would have her retreating in panic, ducking and covering to protect herself. I should have known better but I’d never been with anyone so closed off to love. It was almost as if she didn’t know what it was, how to feel it, much less how to accept it.
I wanted to be the one to give it to her. Her childhood was devoid of emotion, of caring, loving parents. She’d resigned herself to more of the same in her life. It was going to take more than saying a few words, throwing money at her. Not when she didn’t believe my words. I remembered the shock on her face when I’d said them. I’d saved her from having to respond by leaving. Maybe I’d been too hasty, expected too much. I’d pushed her too far.
I wanted to open her eyes, make her see what else was possible. I wanted her to experience love for the first time with me. With her, I usually kept pressing forward, not giving her a chance to slide backward, but this was different. I’d flipped her switch to panic mode, she needed time.
They’d mentioned they were going out last night. Hopefully, Dylan and Hadley took good care of her. I refrained from sending her texts or calling to check in. I’d said what I had to say. I’d wait for her to come to me. If she didn’t or she wasn’t ready, I’d have to change tactics.
I made Declan pancakes, then cleaned the kitchen while he played Legos in his room. When the doorbell rang, my heart pounded in my chest, hoping it was Avery coming to apologize to tell me she loved me too.
Without checking the window, I opened the door, recognizing the harried thirty-something woman on my porch as Erin, Declan’s mother, from the pictures I’d seen from the investigator. Every muscle in my body locked tight.
“Griffin Locke?”
“Yes.” My tone was terse, hoping she wouldn’t say the words I’d feared.
“You have my son.”
Those words hit me square in the chest. I took a step back. “What did you say?”
Why was she here now? First Avery was gone, now Erin would take Declan. I’d be left with nothing.
“You have my son. I want him back.”
“Excuse me?” Why couldn’t I think clearly? Why did it feel like I was standing on quicksand.
“Uncle Griff? Who’s at the door? Is it Avery?” His feet thudded down the steps.
I closed the door slightly so he couldn’t see who it was, not that he’d recognize his own mother. “It’s someone selling something. Give me a minute to get rid of them.”
His face fell. “Oh. Okay.” Then he walked slower up the steps. I waited until he reached the landing before I opened the door.
“Was that him?” She tried to peer around me, but I stepped onto the porch, closing the door behind me.
“I have guardianship papers.” That’s what Avery told me to say if she showed up. I hoped she didn’t call the police, or demand to take him. I needed to call Avery.
She crossed her arms over her chest. “I want him.”
“You can’t have him. He’s mine.” How had I ever contemplated telling her about Declan, wanting her to be involved. Who abandons their child at three months old, only to stand on a porch eight years later demanding him? She had no idea how traumatizing this would be for him. Worse, she didn’t care about him, only herself.
“I came as soon as I found out Julian died.” Her eyes were cold, devoid of sympathy.
I studied her face, attempting to judge her motives. Did she really want or care for Declan or was there some other reason she was here? “Who told you?”
“I saw an article in the paper. You sold your company for millions and you took him from me. He’s mine.”
“You gave up the right to say that when you walked away, every year that went by you weren’t here.” My words came out in a rush. I wanted her gone before Declan realized I was still talking to her.
“You haven’t even asked how Declan is, especially since the only parent he’s ever known died.” I tried to keep my voice down but it was impossible.
She flinched.
“What, you don’t have anything to say about how you abandoned him when he was three months old?”
“What do you know about being a parent? I was young and stupid. Thought there was something better out there if I wasn’t always tied down.”
“Julian stepped up. He was a father to him, took care of him, and he asked me to do the same. There’s nothing I won’t do to protect Declan. Can you say the same?”
“I’ll be back.” She turned, walking down the porch steps, before turning with a sneer. “This isn’t over yet.”
Panic climbed up my throat, my fingers curled into fists as I carefully shut the door. My mind spinning with what I should do. I called Avery.
“Griffin?” Her surprised voice came over the phone.
“She’s here. Declan’s mom showed up on my porch.” My tone was low. I didn’t want Declan to overhear. Inside I was frustrated, scared. Everything I’d put together in Annapolis was unraveling faster than I could hold it together.
Avery gasped.
“Can she take him from me?” I couldn’t keep the hopelessness and fear from my voice.
“I’m so sorry, Griffin.” She was quiet for a few seconds, but when I didn’t respond, she continued, “You told her you had guardianship?”
“I did. She left, but said she’d be back.”
“Did she say what she wanted?”
“She said she wanted Declan. She wants Declan. Fuck, he’s all I have.” I ran my fingers through my hair, desperately trying to keep my voice down.
Everyone in my life was temporary, belonging to someone else. I had no one. It was a worse feeling than when I found out Lorelai cheated on me. The ground dropped out and I was free falling with no one to catch me.
“It’s okay. We’ll get through this. We talked about this, but are you sure she wants Declan?”
Comforted by her words, I let out a long breath. “That’s what she said.”
“Did she say why she was here now? How she found out?”
“She read an article about me selling my company. That’s how she found out about Julian’s death. She said she came as soon as she read the article.”
“Did that article mention you sold your company for millions?”
I wracked my brain, trying to remember her words. “She did say something about that.”
“She might want money.” Her voice was gentle.
As much as it disgusted me, I preferred that over her asking for visitation or custody. She’d do more damage by showing up now than she had by leaving the first time. “She can have whatever she wants.”
“Griffin, we have to be careful about this. Don’t give her any money without talking to me first. We don’t want a situation where she keeps asking for money to stay out of your life. If you are inclined to give her money, we’ll want her to sign a termination of parental rights.”