TRIGGER WARNING:
I don’t usually put one of these in my books because I’m a dark romance author and that should be enough of a trigger warning for most readers. I don’t write typical love stories and I always try to paint a realistic picture. For Desecrated Essence that picture is vividly detailed and extremely realistic.
Desecrated Essence contains very explicit scenes of present rape, non-con, and dub-con. If you have any known or suspected sensitivity to these then you should stop reading now.
Dedication
Only time has the complete power to heal and unfortunately some of us just don’t have enough of it. Make use of the time you’re given.
Before you know it… it’s taken away.
Playlist
Chase Atlantic - Church
Marilyn Manson - Tourniquet
Halestorm-I miss the misery
Halestorm-I get off
The pretty reckless- my medicine
Christina Perri - Jar of Hearts
Bishop Briggs - Dark Side
Chase Atlantic - Right Here
Motionless in White - Another Life
Weeknd – Often
Corpse – Miss You
Door Number Two – Every Damn Day
JC Stewart – I Need You to Hate Me
I watch her letting him guide her with his hand on her lower back and let a growl escape my lips. Doesn’t she know she belongs to me? She’s always belonged to me. This fucker, the Teacher no less, is helping her into his vehicle and she looks up at him with a laugh. Her eyes squint and I just know the hazel is shining bright in them, like they once did for me. I want to rip that laugh out of her throat and ram it down his. Their relationship is the hardest to watch and that’s all I’ve been doing-watching.
When it’s Cooper, they’re playful and annoyingly content, with Caine, it’s intense and borderline dangerous, but with this one, she feels protected and secure. I hate this one the most, not that I don’t hate the others, but this one leaves me burning to maim.
He leans into the passenger seat and I watch as his lips press into hers and I can imagine she moans like the wanton whore she’s become.
They’ve made it a habit to park his car a few blocks from the school so as not to attract attention, but I see them.
I always see them.
They drive off and I lean back against the brick, fighting with the Monster within. The one that wants to watch her suffer at its hands because she killed my brother, because she loves them, because she fucking left me. I’m constantly at war with him but he’s starting to make me see his perspective, she needs to pay for her wrongs.
Everyone pays eventually, I stare down at my hands, still tinged in pink, and scrape some dry, rust colored blood from under my nails.
Everyone will pay.
Brody has been missing for three months. Three months! The guys have searched and come to the conclusion that he’ll come back when he’s ready. I can’t believe they aren’t worried. I’m worried and I know him and I are as far on the outs as it can get. Georgina has also been missing for three months and knowing they’re together only makes my hatred for her burn hotter. He still wants her after everything she’s done. His inner turmoil calls to her toxicity like a moth to the flame.
I’ve watched it with familiarity since we were thirteen years old. How her eyes follow him and his body automatically curls towards hers when she’s near. Jealousy is an emotion I’ve let control me for so long. I’ve been jealous of her, jealous of the golden four, and jealous of just about any girl who giggles at the attention of a boy.
Brody wasn’t here when his family buried Justin-car accident is their story-and again when Lance’s family buried him. Nor has his family released any information about their son’s disappearance, everyone just assumes he’ll be back. I can’t help but wonder, will he be back?
The last three months for me have been a whirlwind. Oliver did find my papa in the Bayou, in a well-known crack house, and blitzed out of his fucking mind. He's been in a rehab facility for the past ninety days and will continue to stay there for another thirty. When I found out he was abusing drugs and alcohol, it felt like a punch to the gut.
All the warning signs were there but I failed to see it and I was so engrossed in my own problems that I didn't see that my only family left needed me. The guilt I carry with me could knock me down. I don’t let it, I keep going day by day, and hope one day it’s not the first thing I think about when I wake up.
The only thing keeping me from completely crumbling are my boys. Yeah, it's weird. I have boyfriends, y'all.
They have been helping me keep things afloat. With my pa gone and the dealership closed, I've had to find a job to keep up with some bills and the guys have helped with everything else. Mortgage, credit card debt, and keeping my fucking lights on. They're also paying for my papa's treatment.
Even Zeke has been coming around to check up on me. He installed a new security system in my house so I would feel safer when I'm here alone, which is rare. There's always one of them here.
Like right now in fact, Zeke is sitting on my worn leather couch with me as we play the newest GTA video game. It was a smooth transition back into our old friendship and we haven't looked back.
I haven't seen Faith around but I know they are still together. I’ve heard the others speak about it. He doesn't talk much about her but I see her name flash on his phone often. Again, the jealousy burns molten when I think of them together and I let it burn like an old friend you just can’t let go of, no matter how awful they are for you.
"Where's my hot piece of ass?" Caine's deep rumble has me breaking my concentration with the game. I watch helplessly as my car veers into a brick wall.
"Look what you did." I pout at him and squeal when he jumps on top of me.
"Well, I guess we're done for the day, Bebelle." Zeke chuckles and gets up.
Before I can respond, Caine has my chin in a deadlock and my mouth thoroughly devoured. The noises I'm making can't be helped and my legs fall open to give him easier access to where I want him.
I hear Zeke clear his throat, "I'll see y’all later, then."
Caine breaks our kiss and looks at Zeke over his shoulder, "you can always stay and watch." He punctuates his point by driving his hips into mine.
Again, I can't even control the mewling noise that leaves my throat at the feel of his large cock pressing into my center.
Zeke's eyes meet mine over Caine's shoulder and I bite my lip as I see the lust in his.
I want him to watch. I want his eyes to rove over me with a hunger he can’t wait to satiate.
He shakes his head and leaves the room in a hurry.
"His loss." Caine growls just before he drags my leggings down.
I don't have much time to prepare as his mouth latches on to my clit and his tongue lashes against it. I dig my fingers into his short, cropped hair and push his face in closer. Caine is like a hurricane, he forces his way in and leaves you feeling broken when he’s done. In his defense, he always warns me ahead of time.