“Phew,” she breathed. “But I think I have a point. What are the chances that you and Zach would end up at the same college?”
Pretty slim considering he wasn’t supposed to be there.
I smoothed my fingers over my temples and down my face. “He hates me, Madison.”
“Well, maybe this your chance to find out why... or in the very least, it’s a chance to show him you’ve moved on. Go out, meet boys… hell, get laid. It’s college.” Her voice turned somber. “She’d want you to have all those rite-of-passage experiences, Calli.”
“I know, I just...”
“You’re scared.”
“I was going to say out of practice.”
“Hey, it could be worse. You could be a virgin.” She chuckled. “You went through something huge this year, something like that is bound to leave scars. But life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass, Calli, it’s about learning to dance in the rain.”
“You know I don’t dance.” Strangled laughter bubbled in my chest.
“Maybe you should start. It’s college, babe. College. You don’t owe anyone anything. Your dad, Callum, even Zach. This is your fresh start. I know it’s complicated and I know you’re probably planning all the ways you can avoid them all,”—I was, but she didn’t need to know that—“but this is your life. Don’t waste it by sitting on the sidelines and watching everyone else live theirs.”
“You’re good at this.”
“Well, duh, I have a lot of experience with assholes.”
Her first and only boyfriend had ripped out her heart and stamped all over it right before they left for college, after they’d decided to do the long-distance thing. He was also a basketball player, the high school team captain to be exact. And although I’d wanted to give Finn the benefit of the doubt—because while they were together, they did make a cute couple—deep down, I knew he’d hurt her.
Ballers couldn’t be trusted.
They were too invested in the game, in the high of the win, the popularity and fame that came with being able to throw a ball through a hoop.
“Have you spoken to him?” I asked.
“What? No. No! I have nothing to say to him. Besides, I already met a cute guy called Toby who I think is the perfect rebound guy.”
“Madison,” I sighed.
“Relax, I’m not going to catch feelings. But I am going to let him help me forget all about Finn and his empty promises. And if you know what’s good for you, babe, you’ll do exactly the same.”
She made it sound so simple. But I didn’t want a rebound guy.
“Well, just be careful.” I knew my best friend, and I knew that despite her strong façade, she wore her heart on her sleeve.
Unlike me, who kept my heart locked away so tight no one could touch it.
After Zach, I hadn’t dated. I’d promised myself I wouldn’t put myself through that again. Then Mom had gotten sick and everything else took a back seat. Because I was all she had, and I didn’t walk out on the people I love.
But was Madison right?
Was this a chance to finally get some closure?
A chance to show Zachary Messiah—and myself—that I’d finally moved on.
“I’ll tell you what,” she said. “I promise to be careful, if you promise to take a risk now and again.”
“I... okay.”
“Okay?” Surprise coated the word.
“Yeah, okay.” I’d already gone against everything I knew and abandoned my father, along with the chicken and vegetables.
I had this.
It was college. Time to spread my wings and live.
“Atta girl,” I heard the smile in Madison’s voice. “She’d be proud of you, ya know. The second you realized Zach was at SU, you could have run, and you didn’t. That’s huge, Calli.”
It wasn’t, not really.
It wasn’t like I had anywhere else to go.
But I knew what she meant, and for a second, I’d wanted to hide. To barricade myself in my dorm and figure a way out of this mess. But I hadn’t.
Because Madison was right.
I needed closure.
I needed to know why Zach hated me so much.
Then, and only then, could I finally be free.
Zach
The Pivot was a sports bar just off campus. It wasn’t really my scene, but it was the preferred hangout for the team. And since I was a member of the Steinbeck Scorpions, I was expected to be present.
The season didn’t start for another two months, but it was important for the team to bond, to practice, and spend time in the gym.
According to tradition, it was also important to get the freshman recruits fucked up and watch them do a bunch of stupid shit. After a serious incident with the basketball captain a few years ago, SU had a zero-tolerance policy toward hazing. But this wasn’t hazing. It was just some good old-fashioned fun. No one would end up hurt or humiliated. Well, no more than usual where a bunch of college students was concerned.
“What do you think of the new guys?” Brad asked me. He leaned back against the bar, watching as they went head to head in a shooter contest.
Trev, the owner, was cool. An ex-Scorpion, he was happy to let us hangout in the back. It had some pool tables, a few booths, and an old jukebox. The walls were littered with Scorpion and NBA paraphernalia.
I took a long pull on my beer, shrugging. “Time will tell.”
“That kid, Kaiden, seems okay.”
“The kid’s got skills,” Joel added. “I saw some footage of him on the court. He could give you a run for your money, Messiah.”
“Fuck off.” I was the best. It’s why Coach Baxter had agreed to my parents’ fucked up proposal. I had natural talent, just like Declan. Just like my father. But what I had in talent, I lacked in ambition. Basketball was their dream, not mine.
“Is that Josie?” Joel groaned and all our eyes went over to where he was staring.
The back room didn’t have a door, it had a big archway that led into the main bar area. And right there, on the makeshift dance floor, was Josie and Calli dancing.
“Holy shit, Molineux,” our power forward, Devyn, said. “Your sister’s got moves.”
“Don’t be looking at my sister.” Joel punched his arm.
“What the fuck, dude? She’s right there. It’s not like I’m looking on purpose.”
Dev wasn’t wrong. You couldn’t miss Josie, rolling and popping her hips, working her tight little body.
A mask of anger slid over Joel’s face. “I need to go...” He motioned to the girls.
Brad snickered. “This year is going to be hella interesting.”
I didn’t miss the flare of interest in his eyes. “You and Josie?” I asked him quietly.
“What? Fuck, no. Joel would cut off my balls and feed them to me through a straw.”
My eyes narrowed, studying him. He seemed cool and calm, but I saw a flicker of fear there. “Whatever,” I grumbled.
He was a fucking liar. He wanted Joel’s little sister; if he hadn’t already had a taste.
“Who’s the other girl?” Dev asked.
“Josie’s little friend?” Brad said. “I don’t know, but she got fucking wasted at the party the other night. I saw Josie carrying her out of there. Total lightweight.”