She was just settling in when she heard a text message come in on her phone. Glancing at it, her heart picked up its pace a bit as she noticed it was Luke.
"Are you in bed yet?"
"Just crawled in," she typed back.
"I'm sorry for being an ass."
"What happened? What was wrong?" she asked.
"I don't know, it just seemed like you were more than happy to just continue on with your life without me. You have your friends and your kids, what do you need me for?"
"Are you serious?" she responded incredulously. "You know I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you, but you're the one who wanted space."
"I know, but it doesn't feel very good," he responded.
"I agree, but this is what you wanted," she said.
"It just seemed like things were moving so fast - you were talking about dresses and locations and honeymoons and tuxes. I thought we would get engaged and then talk about getting married in a few years."
"You neglected to mention that part to me."
"I know, I didn't realize that's what I thought until it was happening."
"Well, I'm in no big rush to get married, I've told you that all along, so we're good."
"Well, either that or we just elope and don't fuss with all this other extra stuff."
Olivia felt like she was getting mental whiplash. One minute, things were going too fast for him, and then he was talking about eloping.
"That would really be rushing things, wouldn't it?" she asked.
"Yeah, I guess, but then it would be done and over with, and there would be none of this back and forth."
"So, the two choices are to either hurry up and get it over with, or wait years?"
She waited for a while as he prepared to send her his response. She couldn't quite wrap her head around why eloping seemed like a good idea to him but just planning a regular wedding wasn't. One minute she felt like she had it figured out, and the next minute she was confused again. After what seemed like several minutes, he sent another message.
"I don't know, I just want to be with you."
"Then why don't we just let that be enough for now?" she answered.
"Sounds good."
"Goodnight, Luke"
"Hey, Olivia?
"Yes?"
"What are you wearing?"
She giggled as she slipped down deeper into her bed and continued to text.
Chapter Forty-Four
She
I t wasn't until she was back at her car that she realized someone had been trying to contact her. The erratic cell coverage in the mountains meant that messages or notifications could come in hours after they were sent.
She checked her voice mail, and she had two messages. As she listened to the first one, she couldn't believe her ears. It was her husband, asking her to come back so they could talk. The second message was also him, this time sounding upset that he couldn't reach her.
"I don't know if you are ignoring me, or what," the message said. "Maybe you're walking in those damn mountains and not getting these messages, I don't know. Who knows? Maybe you got eaten by a bear. Just please, please call me back so we can work this out."
She sat back against the seat of her car, the air conditioner blowing ice - cold air towards her face. She was so shocked to hear from her husband like this. Not that him texting her was a new thing, or leaving a message for her, but they had barely talked for days. They both knew it was over, why was he reaching out now?
She felt a cold ball grow in the pit of her stomach. This was feeling all too familiar.
Chapter Forty-Five
Olivia
A fter spending the evening taking the boys out for pizza and then to the movies, Olivia was glad when it came to a close. It had been a long day at work, and she was looking forward to some time just to herself. It was hard not seeing Luke every night, but she was determined to give him whatever space he needed to figure things out.
As she removed her makeup in front of the bathroom mirror, she fired off a text to him to let him know she was home. She was hoping they could make arrangements to go out tomorrow night as she was missing him terribly. It seemed so strange to think that a few short months ago, she had an entire life that had nothing to do with him. Now it was hard to imagine her life without him in it.
She brushed and flossed her teeth while keeping an eye on her phone, waiting for him to respond to her text. She slipped into her pajamas and brushed her hair, then walked towards her closet and chose an outfit for work the next day. She was beginning to wonder what was taking him so long to respond. Usually, he answered her texts right away, and she had told him she would talk to him around this time.
After she had done everything she could to prepare for the next day, she crawled into bed and plugged her phone in, setting it on her nightstand. She was trying not to worry, or project too much into him not responding, but she could feel the anxiety rising within her. While she waited, she checked her email and answered a couple of them, deleted others. She began unsubscribing to the backlog of emails soliciting her for products and was halfway through her work emails when Luke texted her.
"Hey, what's up?"
"Not much. Just finished getting ready for work tomorrow and climbed into bed."
"Okay, well I just got home, and I have an early morning at work, so I'm going to hit the hay."
"I thought you weren't doing anything tonight?"
"I just went out for a bit," he typed.
"Oh, okay, did you have a nice evening?"
"Yeah, it was okay, you?"
"Good, the boys enjoyed the movie,"
"Good,"
"Did you want to do something tomorrow night?" she texted.
"Yeah, sure."
"What would you like to do?" she asked.
"I don't know, why don't you come here, and I'll cook dinner?"
"That sounds lovely."
"Okay, talk to you later,"
The next night, she raced home from work and jumped in the shower. Using her favorite scented shower gel, she lathered up and shivered with excitement as she ran her hands over her body. She couldn't wait to see him tonight, it felt like it had been forever, even though it was only a couple days. The depth of the pleasure she felt anticipating spending time basking in his attention was almost as intense as the feelings of loss she felt when she thought she might be losing him. She jumped into a matching bra and panties set, and a pair of her best-fitting jeans. Choosing a top carefully, she settled on a plain cotton blouse with buttons up the front that fit her perfectly in all the right places. Adding one of her new, funky necklaces that she had picked up at a flea market and spritzing herself liberally with perfume, she donned her knee-high boots and slipped out the door. She had left the boys with a pizza and strict instructions to get to bed no later than ten.
As she navigated traffic, she couldn't help but reflect on how her life had changed. She had never felt so much excitement and anticipation for a date in her life. Of course, in many ways, she supposed it wasn't really a date. She was going to her boyfriend's place to have dinner. Is that what one called the person you used to be engaged to but were now only sleeping with? A boyfriend? Well, whatever it was, she was looking forward to the evening.