“Yeah, no, that’s fine,” Jacob nodded. He didn’t want to hurt the doctor’s feelings by pointing out that, given his distrustful history with men, a female therapist would probably be preferable.
“Okay, good. Now, let’s see here,” he said, quickly perusing the list of questions he wanted to go over with Jacob before he departed. “Honestly, I think we’ve covered all of this in previous sessions. Unless you have anything else you wanted to discuss,” he looked up at Jacob with a grin, “I think you’re ready.”
Jacob’s lips turned up at the words. Doctor Yang thought he was ready, and despite his fears regarding the changes that were to come, he couldn’t help but agree.
“I don’t think I have any other questions. But…,” he hesitated, sitting up straighter, “I just want to say that this has been better than I ever thought it could be.”
Doctor Yang smiled warmly.
“Seriously,” Jacob continued. “You’re a really great doctor, and I’m gonna miss talking to you,” he encouraged.
“Mmm,” Doctor Yang muttered. “Well, I appreciate that very much, Jacob. You’ve been a joy to work with, as well, and I have no doubt that, if you stick to the rules set for you, take your medication, and participate in your therapy sessions, you will continue to find happiness in your life.”
Jacob smiled, water beginning to blind his vision. He blinked back the tears and wiped his eyes clear as they both chuckled at the sudden emotion in the room.
“Thank you, sir,” Jacob replied with a fervent nod.
Doctor Yang rose to his feet, and Jacob followed suit, extending his hand for a shake. The doctor returned his handshake firmly with both hands. He gave Jacob some instructions on what was to come, informing him that a cab would arrive shortly to take him to the bus station. There, he would begin his journey to Westbridge University, in Cottonwood, Ohio, where he had been enrolled to begin his first semester of college just two weeks after classes had begun for the rest of the students.
Jacob said his goodbyes to Doctor Yang and made his way to the cafeteria. His stomach was too full of nerves to find breakfast fruitful, but he wanted to bid farewell to the friends he had made over the years at Bellevue.
He found the group easily at their usual table, and the three men greeted him with wide smiles and congratulatory slaps on the back.
“Here he is, Mister Bigshot-Early-Bird,” Mikey jeered, giving Jacob a playful punch as he took the seat beside him at the white, rickety table covered with plastic trays of food. “When you bustin’ out of this joint, anyway?”
“Cab should be here in...,” Jacob turned to glance at the clock above the food counter, “about ten minutes.”
“Wow, ten minutes to freedom,” Max said, shaking his head. “That’s surreal.”
“Tell me about it,” Jacob replied, letting out a sigh as he looked around the large room, reminiscing on his time there over the years. Despite the cold, white walls, the unfriendly staff, and the constant, chaotic buzz of patients muttering things to themselves and others, Bellevue had come to feel nearly like home to Jacob. In fact, he could hardly remember the fear and trepidation he felt when he walked into that cafeteria for the first time.
On his first morning at Bellevue, after arriving late the previous night and getting settled into his shared room, he made his way to the cafeteria for breakfast. He fell into line with the other patients, grabbing a tray and a set of utensils from the stacks on the counter. He graciously accepted his mediocre food from the surly cafeteria workers, pausing at the end of the line as he appraised the full room for a place to sit. With gratitude, he spotted a lone chair in the corner of the room at an empty table. He made a bee-line to get the spot before it was claimed, narrowly dodging the flailing arms of a man with wild eyes, swearing at the empty chair in front of him. Slumping into the uncomfortable, plastic chair, he let out a sigh of relief to at least have a bit of space to himself. Picking absently at the food he didn’t have an appetite for, he glanced around the room again, feeling completely out of place among the other residents. So far, everyone he had encountered had mental issues far more observably significant than his own, and the idea of ever fitting in there felt impossible.
As his eyes continued their sweep of the room, they settled on a thin man sitting at the table across from him. He had long, dirty-blonde hair and a judgmental grimace on his face as he scanned the room as well. They locked eyes for a brief moment before Jacob turned his attention back to his food, experimentally popping a piece of mystery meat in his mouth. The sign by the food station said it was ham, but it tasted more like cheap bologna.
He looked up again, and the young man was still staring at him, eyes narrowed as he appraised Jacob’s appearance. Jacob shifted uncomfortably in his seat, trying to avoid direct eye contact.
“Hey, you,” the man called out. Jacob’s heart raced. Swallowing back his unease, he looked up to meet the man’s gaze. The man leaned forward in his seat, still staring at Jacob with narrowed eyes. “There’s something weird about you,” he stated bluntly.
Jacob raised his eyebrows, taking another glance at the extensive array of “weird” all around them. “Me?” he asked incredulously.
“Yeah,” the man said, rising from his chair and picking up his tray to migrate to Jacob’s table. “You’re too normal,” he dropped his tray on the table and took the seat across from him. “What’s your deal?”
“Uh… what do you mean?” Jacob asked.
“I mean,” the man leaned back in his chair and spread his legs, biting off a piece of blueberry muffin, “what are you in for?”
Jacob blushed at the man’s brazenness, picking up his own muffin and taking a bite.
“Not the sharing type,” the man noted. “Gotcha. No worries. Well hey, I’m Mikey,” he offered, presenting his hand for some kind of gang-inspired shake.
“Jake,” he replied, reciprocating the handshake to the best of his ability.
“First day?” Mikey asked.
Jacob chuckled. “Is it that obvious?”
“Nah,” he shrugged. “It’s just, I was getting worried I was the only normal person here,” he laughed loudly, spooning more food into his mouth.
Jacob cringed at his new friend’s open judgment of the other patients. “So, how long have you been here?” he asked.
“Eh, about a week,” Mikey replied with a shrug.
Jacob raised his eyebrows. “Wow,” he breathed, envious of the man’s seemingly impeccable ability to adapt so quickly to his new surroundings.
“Hey, you gonna eat that?” he asked, pointing at Jacob’s untouched hard-boiled egg.
Jacob shook his head, pushing his tray away from himself. Mikey reached across the table, helping himself to the food.
That shared meal marked the beginning of an interesting friendship. Mikey became a quick comrade of Jacob’s, a source of calm in the middle of the storm. He had an air of confidence in everything he did, which served as a healthy balance to Jacob’s constant anxiety and over-thinking. Mikey was quick to share that he was a self-admitted sex-addict, seeking counseling for that and a few other issues. It took some time for Jacob to open up about his own reasons for being at Bellevue, but eventually, over the years, he had shared enough bits and pieces of his past for Mikey to get a pretty clear picture.