“Yeah. My mom made sure that I can handle some dirty clothes. I’ve been doing laundry since I was Madeline’s age. I’ve got this,” I assured him before he headed into Charlotte’s room, and I got another pair of gloves and a plastic bag to collect the messy pile.
It wasn’t my first time doing puke-stained laundry, and I had the machine loaded and running in short order. Still down on the lower level, I pulled out my phone to message Gabrielle to make sure she made it home safely.
While on my phone, I discovered a recent message from Max.
Dude. This party is lit. I’m winning big and the food is amazing.
I sent him a fast text back. Happy for you.
Having missed dinner, I was rather hungry myself, but I’d worry about that later. Unpleasant smells were still lingering in my nostrils too much to eat quite yet.
A reply came from Max before I put the phone away. Not too late for you to come. I didn’t find a taker for the other invite. You could get in on some later games.
Felix wanted me gone. The easy answer would be to leave and check back with him later, but even if I was tempted, no way could I focus on poker knowing what Felix was dealing with here.
Another text came in from Max before I could reply. Come have some fun. Some great prizes to play for.
Voices from upstairs echoed down the nearby vent, Felix’s soothing tones carrying even if I couldn’t make out specific words. Fun. I sure said that word often enough. And this certainly wasn’t a fun evening. But perhaps not everything came down to maximizing enjoyment. I’d been so lonely at the cabin without Felix and the girls there even while objectively having fun.
Max could play for prizes. I had one already and I wasn’t letting it go. Sorry. I’m needed here.
That’s what had been missing from my life. The being needed. I’d thought at first that it was Felix and the way he took care of me. And that was nice, something I hadn’t let myself have before. But there was also this, the getting to take care of him in return.
And yes, Felix was capable of saving the day all on his own, but a part of me needed to help. It was the mission-critical feel that every action had on deployment, all hands on deck to keep the sub running and every task vital to someone else and the group as a whole.
When I was around Felix and the girls, I felt like part of a team. I’d been so focused on other parts of my life for so long I’d forgotten how a family could be a team, and I hadn’t let myself want one for myself because not wanting was way simpler than wanting and never getting. However, now I wanted and I was determined to make it happen.
Phone still in my hand, I headed to the kitchen. Sick people needed hydration. I knew that much, but as I took stock of the pantry and fridge, I wasn’t sure what else would be needed. But I knew someone who would have the answers. I dialed before I could talk myself out of the idea.
“Hey, Mom?” I asked when she picked up on the first ring.
“Calder! To what do I owe the pleasure?” She sounded delighted but also more than a little scolding.
I did some fast math in my head as to when I’d called last. She was justified. “Sorry. Guess I haven’t called in a while.”
“You haven’t,” she agreed before softening her tone. “But that’s okay. I know you get busy.”
Typical Mom, making excuses for my shortcomings. I needed to set a damn alarm on my phone or something to check in with her more, even if her questions did grate. She was still my mom, and watching Felix with the girls the past several weeks had underscored how lucky I was to have her.
“Yeah, I’ve been busy, but I’ll try to do better. Promise.”
“Good. But what do you need now?”
Ouch. I rubbed the back of my neck. That she immediately knew I was calling with a purpose made my idea of a phone alarm that much more necessary. “I’ve got a...friend with some sick kids. Like stomach sick. I know you’ve been there.”
“And how.” She groaned and there was a rustling sound like she was rearranging something. Like me, she always needed to keep busy, even while on the phone. “Lord, one time it was all four of you during one of Dad’s longest deployments.”
“I remember. You were a trouper. Anyway, I’m looking at my friend’s pantry now, and trying to think what they might need for the next few days.” The pantry was now nicely organized, but it was rather sparse now that we’d removed so much, and I wasn’t sure what all sick kids needed.
“Got something to write with?” she asked, all serious mom business now.
“Yep.” I grabbed a notebook from the drawer where Felix kept his pharmaceutical company samples. “I’m ready.”
My mom rattled off a lengthy list of soup types, broth, electrolyte drinks, ice pops, and more.
“You’re helping your friend?” she asked after I took notes of what to order. She sounded rather incredulous.
“Yeah.” As with Max earlier, I wasn’t sure why everyone found it so hard to believe I might choose to stay in on a Friday night or might choose to do something for someone else. If I’d really been that self-centered for years, maybe that was yet another reason to try to change. “My friend is a single dad. Uncle raising his nieces. I like helping him out.”
“Single, you say?” She suddenly sounded way more interested in my mission to help Felix with a grocery order.
“Mom.”
“Sorry. Anyway, if it’s your friend on his own—”
“And me.”
“And you. Make sure he stays hydrated and gets rest himself. I slept an ungodly number of hours after being up three days when that virus hit all four of you at once. It’s easy to forget to eat and drink when the little ones need you.”
“I’m sure. I’ll make sure he rests.” I nodded to the empty room, glad for another reason to stay even after the groceries came.
“He’s lucky to have your help.” She praised me like I was twelve and needed a reward for making a good choice.
“It goes both ways,” I said absently, leaning against the counter, forgetting what the Mom-radar would likely read into such a statement.
“Oh?” Something else rattled on her end. Even as I groaned, I still loved her predictability.
“Mom. I promise a longer conversation where I tell you everything.”
“Does everything mean a potential date to Arthur’s wedding?” She sounded so eager that I knew she was leaning forward even without being able to see her.
“We’ll see.” I wasn’t telling her that I’d already asked or I’d be in for another twenty-minute conversation right there. “I’ll let you know.”