“What is it?” Silas grabs her hand, squeezing.
“I obviously don’t have the history with Bianca that Eva does, or you, Jared, but…when I found out about the three of you, I kept a lot of crap buried. I knew logically what happened was before my time, before Silas and I were together. But that didn’t make it hurt any less or make it any easier.”
Silas and Pansy share a look, suggesting they’ve talked about this before.
“I don’t know Eva that well, so all I can do is guess based on how I would feel if it were one of my sisters with Silas. It would be difficult to forgive, and…”
“Go on.” I slide my back along the couch until I’m upright, not surprised by what she’s saying but also needing to hear it.
“She may need more than time.”
“What are you saying?” I lean forward, rubbing my fingers at my temples.
“Just that she loves you—even I can see that without really knowing her—but…”
“Love might not be enough,” I say for her, and she nods, pressing her lips together. “Yeah, I know.”
I stand, raking a hand through my hair and looking over at my friends. “Look, I’m sorry for waking you up at the crack of dawn. I was feeling weak, and I appreciate you hearing me out.”
“You can stay.” Pansy gets to her feet.
“Yeah, stay. We’ll make breakfast and maybe Pansy will finally get her chance to teach us yoga.” Silas rests his hand on my shoulder. “It can’t hurt.”
I smirk, shaking my head. “Another time. I’m feeling okay, really. But thanks, and I’ll call you.”
On the way home, I take a detour to the hotel where Eva is staying. It isn’t planned, but the thought of going back to my place to stew some more is sickening.
To make matters worse, she doesn’t answer her door. I try longer than I should, finally resting my head on the wooden door in frustration.
“She isn’t there.”
I lift my head in the direction of the voice, and standing almost beside me is a young woman, hair wet, in a white fluffy hotel robe.
“Sorry?” I straighten and turn to face her.
“Our rooms are across from each other. We went down to the pool at the same time. She’s still there.” She smiles at me and there’s that familiar glint in her eye—she knows who I am.
It’s sad to say, but people tell famous people way more than they’d tell some random stranger. It’s like their survival instincts to be wary and keep their mouths shut get hijacked around a celebrity.
“The pool? Where is it?”
“I can show you.” She heads toward the elevator, glancing over her shoulder to make sure I’m following.
“That’s okay. If you tell me where it is, I’ll find it.” I shove a hand into my pocket and smile.
“Okay. It’s on the fourth floor.” She pushes the down button at the elevator, never taking her eyes off me.
“Thanks, I really appreciate it.”
“No problem.” She beams, slowly turning on her heel, and I start to think this was easier than I expected when she seems to think better of it and stops. “Are you…Jared Grange?”
“The one and only.” I give her one of my lopsided grins, putting on the rock star persona.
“Oh my God, I thought so. I loved you in Trojan. I was so upset when you guys broke up.”
“Hey, we didn’t break up. We retired.” I don’t know why, but it bothers me when people make it sound like the relationship soured.
The thought causes my stomach to churn at just how close that is to how things stand between Eva and me.
“Oh, yes, sorry.” She bats her eyelashes and the elevator door opens. “Is it true your debut solo album is coming soon?”
“It’s true.” I step into the elevator, hitting the four button.
“Hey, what do you want with that lady?” She hooks her thumb toward Eva’s room, down the hall.
“Listen, I have to go. Thanks again.”
Before she can say much more than you’re welcome and bye, the door closes and I exhale a sigh of relief.
When I get to the pool, Eva is the only one in the water. She’s wearing a one-piece bathing suit. The pristine white fabric shines against her bronze skin and toned muscles.
She floats in the pool like a starfish. Her long black hair is wisps of dark smoke invading the water. Thin straps sit on her shoulders and her nipples are hard, poking through the material.
Heat coils in my groin as my jeans tighten.
Fuck, I want her.
I can’t live without her.
She’s so still. Is she breathing? My eyes squint, staring hard and praying for life. The slow and steady movement of her chest, in and out, settles my racing heart.
Like the song we sang together so long ago, “Everlong,” our breaths are joined. Her exhale is a release, giving me her. Mends my wrecked heart, filling me and making me whole, even if only for a breath.
I scan the pool deck, and my gut clenches and my jaw tics. Miguel is standing sentinel in a suit, leaning against a tiled wall. He’s fixed on Eva, and his leer makes me want to smash his face.
Maybe it’s because he senses me, although I think he clocked me the second I walked in, his gaze flicks to me. A smug smirk owns his face.
“Jared?” Eva wades to the edge of the pool, questioning brown eyes boring into me.
A hot ball of shame or something I can’t quite explain bulldozes through my chest, tumbling into my gut. “I needed to see you.”
She grabs a towel from a lounge chair and wraps it around her body. Her hands squeeze the excess water from her hair, and out of the corner of my eye, Miguel approaches.
“We have company.” I don’t take my eyes off her, watching to see if she invited him, knew he was here, but she looks surprised and upset.
“Miguel, leave.” She holds a hand out, telling him to stay back.
“Eva, I’m worried about you. Bianca told me.” He sneers in my direction, and I can only imagine what my lying former manager told him. “You don’t have to speak to him.”
“You don’t get to tell me what to do.” The muscles in her neck are tight, tendons straining, and she winces, placing a hand at the base of her skull.
“Are you okay?” I lightly touch her arm, and she recoils.
Miguel doesn’t miss her rejection and feeds off it, stepping closer without a care for her warning.
“Another headache? Let me take care of you.” His tone is softer, almost intimate.
“No, I don’t need your kind of help. I am fine. Leave me alone. I have nothing to say to you.”
“You heard her—leave.” I step in front of her.
He puffs out his chest, getting ready to say something when she moves to stand at my side. He must see something to cause all the air to rush out of him, and along with it goes his bravado.
“Eva, if you need my help, call me. Please. Don’t suffer.”
She folds her arms over her chest, and he leaves without another word.
“Jared, why are you here?”
Glancing down at her, I notice the puffiness around her red-rimmed eyes. Her expression holds so many emotions, some of which I can only guess but don’t fully comprehend.