I didn’t respond. I just ran down to him, closing the distance between us. And I lunged into his arms.
He caught me, grabbing my ass as my legs straddled his waist.
We both just stared at each other as he held me. Like this was some kind of dream. And I knew it then. That he’d dreamed of this too. That he’d ached for me too. That he needed me too. He didn’t need to say it.
But I had a million things I needed to say to him. Right now there was only one thing I needed him to know though. “I’m not pissed off at the world anymore.” I stared into his eyes. “You’re not a substitute for what I really want. You are what I really want. You’re my first choice. And I’m asking you to kiss me.”
His eyes gravitated to my lips and then back to my eyes. “I’m dreaming.”
I smiled. “No. I love you and only you, Miller. I’m in love with you…”
He silenced me with a kiss. And it wasn’t at all how I remembered his kisses to be. It was like he was devouring me. I had no idea if it was because I hadn’t been kissed in over a year. Or if because his feelings had grown too. But these weren’t sweet lazy kisses in the middle of the night. He kissed me like he was starving for me. And I kissed him back the same way. Because I’d been dying to kiss him for longer than I should have been. Back at the beach house. Last Christmas morning. I’d wanted him then. I’d always wanted him.
My fingers slid to the back of his neck as I deepened the kiss. I accidentally bit down on his lower lip as my teeth chattered in the cold. I needed more of his lips. More of his tongue. More everything.
“You’re soaked,” he said and lifted his mouth from mine way too soon. “Why aren’t you wearing a coat?”
I didn’t want to talk about where I’d been. I just wanted him to kiss me again. I pulled his face back down to mine and he groaned in my mouth.
He started carrying me somewhere, but I wasn’t paying attention. All I knew was that I needed more. I didn’t want to ever stop kissing him. Holding him. Feeling his hands on me.
Suddenly I wasn’t shivering anymore. I heard him kick the door closed with his foot, but I didn’t stop kissing him.
He leaned forward, lowering us down onto the couch. And then his lips fell from mine.
“I’ll find you a change of clothes,” he said. “Give me a sec.”
Before I could protest, he was walking out of the room.
My hoodie was heavy from the wet snow. I pulled it off over my head and dropped it on the floor. My tank top underneath was soaked too.
I looked at the hallway Miller had disappeared down.
I’d only ever slept with one boy. I’d made the wrong choice last year. And it was about time I fixed that. I wanted to forget all the pain. I needed him to help me forget. And I’d dreamt so much of having Miller that I knew I couldn’t wait another second. I was sick of dreaming. I wanted him.
I pulled off my wet tank top, kicked off my shoes, and somehow managed to peel my soaked jeans down my thighs. I was standing in the middle of his living room in just my underwear.
It was forward.
I swallowed hard.
It’s what I wanted. Him. I’d been dreaming of another Christmas with him. Another Christmas just like this. Where we spent the day tangled up together. I moved to stand in front of the fireplace. The warmth from the flames drew me even closer.
“Brooklyn?”
I turned around to face him.
His eyes traveled down to the tops of my exposed cleavage and down to the lace of my panties. His Adam’s apple rose and then fell. “There’s a bathroom at the end of the hall.”
I took a step toward him and took the clothes out of his hand. “I have a better idea.” I dropped the clothes on the floor and draped my hands behind his neck.
“You’re still shivering.” His hands settled on my hips.
Was I? I didn’t feel cold. I just felt…alive. Like my dreams were morphing into reality. “Then maybe you should warm me up.”
“I’m not even supposed to be touching you.” But his thumbs had hooked under the waistband of my panties, like he was dying to lower them. Dying to touch me.
And God, I wanted him to touch me. “We’re free now. We can do whatever we want.” I stared at him, daring him to make the first move.
“And what do you want?” His eyes searched mine. Like I held all the power here. But I didn’t. I was already too far gone.
“You. I want you.”
Chapter 29
Thursday
He grabbed the back of my neck and pulled my lips back to his. It’s like those were the exact words he needed to hear. I’d say them to him forever. You. I want you. You, you, you. I want you, Miller.
I wasn’t even sure how it happened, but we fell to the rug in front of the fire. Him pressed on top of me.
It was like the months apart made it impossible to be close enough to him. My fingers slid under his shirt, tracing the contours of his abs. I remembered staring at him as we ran together. I’d been desperate to touch him even then.
He leaned back and pulled his shirt off. And then his mouth was back on mine. He was devouring me again. Just like he had outside when I asked him to kiss me.
I reached down and felt his erection through his jeans.
He groaned into my mouth.
He didn’t stop me as I unbuttoned and unzipped his pants. God, I couldn’t get close enough. I needed his skin against mine. I needed him inside of me. I needed to remember what it felt like to be loved. But before I could reach into his boxers, he moved.
He kissed down my stomach and nipped my inner thigh with his teeth.
Oh, fuck. I wanted this. I wanted all of this. But right now? If I didn’t have him inside of me, I was going to explode. “Miller, please.”
He pulled my panties down and pressed his lips to my clit.
It wasn’t what I was asking for, but oh my fucking God. I felt my hips thrust up to meet his mouth. His tongue greedily stroked me. Faster and faster. He swirled around my wetness, practically grinding his face against my pussy.
I’d never experienced anything so hot in my life.
My fingers dug into his hair as his nose rubbed against my clit.
Yes. Just like that.
He moved his mouth back to my clit as he thrust his fingers inside of me. And his throat made this guttural noise, like I was the most delicious thing he’d ever tasted. Like he could never get enough.
And I broke.
My legs shook and my back arched as I pulled him closer. God I couldn’t get close enough to him.
I’d touched myself while thinking about him. I’d envisioned this moment. But this felt a million times better.
He placed one last slow stroke against my pussy and then kissed back up my stomach.
He stopped when he was eye level with me, putting his weight on his hands. “You came back to me.” He grabbed the center of my bra and pulled down, letting my breasts free. He groaned again.
My heart was racing so fast. I didn’t have any words. My mind was scrambled from what he’d just done.
“What am I going to do with you, Brooklyn Sanders?”
I felt tears welling in my eyes. I loved that he didn’t call me a Pruitt. He didn’t think I was a monster. He never had.
He pushed my thighs farther apart, spreading me for him. “You have no idea how long I’ve dreamt of this moment,” he said. His thumb brushed across my clit again. “I’ve been hoping you’d come. But…I didn’t actually think you would.” He pulled away. “I don’t even have a condom.”