I step out of my bedroom to collect and put on my watch which I left in the kitchen earlier when I hear my daughter give away my plans for the evening.
“Grandma is here and we’re going to watch a movie together because mummy is going out for dinner, she looks so pretty.”
I stop and stare at my daughter then my mother with wide eyes. Shit, I didn’t want him knowing that because frankly, it’s none of his business but at the same time I could care less. My mother just smiles and shrugs her shoulders at me. I have no idea what his reaction to that piece of news was because Charlotte just continued talking about what movie she plans on watching.
There’s not much to say about my relationship with Henry. My mother pushed me to go out on a date with him after I told her about the first time he asked me out. I honestly couldn’t understand why he wanted to bother with me, a single mother with a lot of baggage. I gave in and we tried dating for a few months but neither one of us was truly ready or felt it was working the way it should be. His wife unfortunately died due to complications from childbirth and he’s also had a hard time raising his son on his own so I can empathise with him. The spark was missing between us but our arrangement works, friends with benefits when we need each other and an ear to listen when we need to vent or simply have an adult conversation. He’s free to do as he pleases as am I, and there’s no jealousy or arguments to deal with.
I kiss Charlotte goodnight and I’m out the door. I’m meeting Henry at the restaurant. It’s always easier for us to meet somewhere. That way I can leave whenever I like and not have to rely on him to bring me back home. It’s so nice to dress up once in a while outside of my work attire and mummy clothes. Tonight I’ve chosen a simple black lacy dress which shows off my legs. One good thing about living in Perth is that it’s warm for most of the year.
I park my car in the restaurant’s car park behind the building and enter inside. Balthazar’s is situated at the base of an original art deco apartment block, its dishes focusing on local produce. One of its white walls is decorated with a long black and white print which I can never figure out whether it’s meant to be plants or sea creatures.
Henry arrived before me and is already seated at the square table beside the window, overlooking the city lights, waiting for me. I see him before he sees me. He’s dressed in black dress pants and a dark grey buttoned shirt. Unfortunately my heart doesn’t speed up unlike when Nick showed up. What is wrong with me?
“Hi, have you been waiting long?” He smiles and stands to greet me with a kiss to the cheek. He really is a handsome man and would make any number of female hearts flutter. I hope he finds someone who he can be happy with and appreciates him eventually. He’s a genuinely nice guy.
“Not at all. You look amazing.”
“Thank you.”
He’s already ordered my favourite white wine for us. I take my seat opposite him and lift my glass to take a sip of the cold crisp drink. The waiter appears to take our order then leaves us. After the usual niceties and comfortable conversation about work and the kids he folds his hands on top of the table and brings up an unexpected topic.
“So, Nicholas Moore?” I bring my eyes up to meet his trying to seem unaffected.
“What about him?” I take another larger sip of my wine.
“I knew he looked familiar at the park but couldn’t quite place him. He’s Charlotte’s father isn’t he?”
“I don’t want to talk about it.” I answer, placing my glass down.
“Okay, but you didn’t deny it.” I let out a deep sigh. What’s the point of being secretive about it anymore?
“Yes, he is. It’s a long and messy story. We were engaged once upon a time but it didn’t work out. The only thing that matters to me is Charlotte and ensuring she is happy and has a relationship with her father.”
“He still loves you, you know. Hey, I don’t blame the guy, I saw the way he was looking at you, and me, as if he wanted to rip my head off.” He starts laughing.
“Probably.” I giggle back. Nick always was the jealous type even if it wasn’t warranted.
“Do I need to pick up my game here?” He jokes.
“There is no competition here, Henry. Please, I don’t want to spend the evening talking about him. There’s nothing to tell.” Our waiter finds that moment to return with our meals and all thoughts and talk about Nick are forgotten.
At the end of the evening Henry walks me to my car. He traps my body between himself and the door, his hands on either side of me on the car roof as he leans towards me for a kiss. It’s gentle and sweet but it’s lacking the passion and fireworks. I felt more in that brief and unexpected kiss Nick laid on me when he was here. God, I’m such a bitch thinking about that with Henry stuck to my face.
“So, are you following me back to my place?” He asks softly.
Am I? I usually don’t hesitate in answering him, why am I even overthinking this?
“Yes.”
“I’ll see you there.” He opens up my door allowing me to get into the driver’s seat.
An hour and a half later I’m driving back home having left Henry asleep in his bed. It starts to rain suiting my mood. I’m a terrible person. I was in that bed with one man but another kept finding his way into my head. I’m so mad with myself. Fuck you, Nicholas Moore. I will not allow you to ruin me. I’ve worked too hard to become this strong.
I enter my quiet house, say goodnight to my mother and step-father that head off, check on my sleeping daughter and finally collapse into my own bed after a hot shower.
I lay in bed listening to the rain falling outside while tears fall from my eyes. There’s a deep anguish in me I wish would disappear. How can someone go from being the reason you wake up smiling to the reason you cry yourself to sleep. You’re so stupid, Alannah. Haven’t you cried enough? My mother is right damn it. I can’t lie to myself. As much as I despise Nick he still affects me. I just need to ensure he never realises that.
Chapter 9
Alannah
I’m woken up by a constant, annoying banging. I pry one eye open to look at the time on my alarm clock. I groan when I see it’s only seven thirty. I’m so tired and haven’t had anywhere near enough sleep. The banging starts again and it sinks in that someone is knocking on my front door. Who the hell is here so early on a Sunday morning? I better get up before they wake up Charlotte as well. It better be important or whoever it is will get a piece of my mind for disturbing me. Throwing the covers off I grab my fluffy blue robe off the hook on the back of my bedroom door, putting it on as I walk towards the front door and yank it open forcefully.
“What-” The rest of the words die on my lips.
Not in a million years did I expect the person standing on the other side of my front door. In the five years since I last saw them they have changed and grown so much I almost didn’t recognise her at first. She’s dressed in black tights with a red, short sleeved, knitted jumper dress over it. Her once short dark hair is now long and blonde.
“Melissa?” I gasp in disbelief. What in the world is Nick’s sister doing here?