Leaning back against his chest, Kova slid his arms around my hips to embrace me. He pulled me to him and his large body engulfed mine. His arms were my security.
"Are we really going to do this?" I asked, my voice shaky.
I scooted closer and turned slightly to the side, resting my head on his bicep that was the perfect height as a pillow. I pressed my face into his arm and inhaled softly. We folded into each other and held on tight. My heart filled with warmth. He smelled like home. Kova leaned down and placed a kiss to my cheek.
Kova had once said there was no Kova without Ria, but the truth was there was no Ria without Kova.
Neither one of us had truly been living until we connected with each other. I’d taught him how to find true happiness, and he’d showed me how strong I could be. He’d prepared me for the battle I would soon face, and I was ready.
"Thank you for the necklace. I like your idea much better."
"I had it custom made. It is engraved underneath."
My eyes widened. I leaned forward to look, but he tugged me back. "Look at it later," he whispered. "Stay with me a little longer."
A soft smile tipped my lips. I nestled into Kova and absorbed his essence when it dawned on me. "What if I hadn't made it to the Olympics?"
"I had something else picked out for making the National team, but once I knew you were chosen for the Olympic team, I rushed the order."
"I love it so much," I said, my voice throaty. "I'll never take it off."
Kova kissed the space under my ear, his nose grazing my cheek. After a few last moments together, his next words twisted my stomach with instant nausea.
"Let us get your luggage."
I tensed, tightening my grip on him. My heart started to pound. His raw voice wreaked havoc on my heart. Tears instantly rose to my eyes and I squeezed them shut. I sniffled and anxiety swelled in my throat.
After a few moments I finally responded, and Kova dropped his arms.
Inhaling a deep breath, I walked to get my belongings. I'd only lived here for a couple of years, yet these walls held enough memories to last a decade. I wished I could take them with me.
I turned off the lights and my knees weakened. This was getting more and more real and I was beginning to question if I could actually go through with it or not. I loved him with all my heart.
Walking back into the living room, I found Kova near the front door. He had my World Cup duffle bag over his shoulder and my large rolling suitcase in one hand. He extended his arm and I faltered in my steps and stopped walking.
I stood across from him and my breathing labored. My chest was spasming in one breath and constricting in the other. Eyes widening, I felt the onset of a panic attack starting. Kova's eyes narrowed and I tensed, feeling the pressure intensify. My fingers flew to my throat and I was instantly scared. I tried to push against it with a slow pull of oxygen and it only backfired. Lips parting, I stared at Kova, trying to swallow and I couldn't.
Kova dropped my bag and stalked over to me. He grabbed my upper arm and yanked me to him. I gasped and my chest expanded right before he gripped the back of my neck and slammed his lips to mine. His hard kiss was intended to snap sense into me, and he instructed me to breathe as he let go of my arm and wrapped his around the small of my back. His fingers loosened on my neck.
I listened, steadying myself.
Kova gave me one more kiss and reached for my hand, tugging me behind him. "I love you. Now let us go."
I locked up my condo for the last time.
Timing, man. It loved to fuck with me.
Fifty-Seven
Walking down the hallway, Kova pressed a quick kiss to my shoulder.
I leaned into him and placed my other hand on the fold of his elbow. He kissed the top of my head as we made our way toward the elevator together.
I had a gut feeling he was scared himself despite trying to seem like he had it under control. Kova kept me glued to his side and kept giving me little kisses.
Neither one of us spoke while we walked to his car. Once my luggage had been stored away, Kova opened the passenger door for me. I turned to thank him, but he was purposely looking elsewhere. He blinked, noticing me but still didn't look. I pulled back, feeling the pinch in my heart sharpen until I saw that his eyes were glossy.
I didn't say anything and took my seat.
The drive to the airport was exceptionally quiet. We didn't waste the time talking. We laced our fingers together over his console and I rested my head on his arm as he drove the forty-five minute distance. He kept his gaze on the road the entire time. I couldn't see his eyes behind his sunglasses, but I noticed the harsh lines around his mouth.
Time passed too quickly and we were exiting the highway.
"You can do the drop off so it's easier for you," I suggested.
"I will park."
My stomach cramped. I had a feeling he was going to say that. I wanted him to park, but I also didn't.
It took no time to park and check in my suitcase. Kova took my hand and didn't let go. We walked into the terminal and checked the departing times. Kova looked at his watch then looked over my head. He read the signs, then he took a step and I followed.
It was funny how emotions worked. Kova and I knew there was no point in trying to make light of our situation with feeble talk. There was nothing either of us could say that would bring even an ounce of comfort. The fact was the end result wouldn't change. I was still leaving.
I eyed the escalator knowing Kova couldn't go with me past that point.
The closer we got to it, the warmer my blood heated. My heart viciously attacked my ribs. I watched the moving stairs climb and realized I didn't want to do this.
I was going to be sick.
Kova tugged me toward an empty luggage area. He dropped my duffle bag then turned toward me and cupped my face, encasing us under the lip of his hat. My hands automatically slid under his arms to hug him tight.
My emotions were already elevated and they broke the moment Kova pressed his body to mine. Tears seeped from my eyes as he swept a kiss across my mouth. His lips were damaging, and his fingers wrapped around the sides of my head and gripped me. I drew in air through my nose and fisted his shirt in my hand. He didn't want to say goodbye.
Kova ripped away, his eyes pierced my heart and his voice held me hostage.
"Understand something, Adrianna." A soft whimper escaped my lips. "I will come for you."
I was shattered.
Completely shattered inside.
I never thought we would come to this. Nodding, my jaw trembled in his palms. I wanted to make him promise he would come for me.
Drawing in a breath, my words shook as I cried softly. "I wish things were different and you were coming with me."
He didn't respond. He couldn't. Tears blurred my vision again. I glanced over my shoulder at the escalator. Once I stepped on, there was no turning back. Knowing I was running out of time, I started to panic.
I looked back at him. "You said you sold the gym. Come with me," I whispered.
"No, Malysh."
My heart sank. Kova’s eyes shifted back and forth over mine. I'd seen him suffer in the past, but nothing compared to how he was now. He was bleeding love and drowning in it…like me.
"You are going alone."
"But you said you sold the gym," I said, a cross between a beg and a whimper.