I want to remind him that I'm usually responsible for that, but I let him stew in his anger for now and just nod. “Yes.”
He turns on one foot and leaves before Lola comes to the table to sit in front of me. “What is going on with you two?”
I turn to look at Baz and thankfully, Hayden takes a cue like a champ. “Can I help him get ready today?”
Baz looks excited and jumps up. He’s really taken to Hayden. I give him a thank you smile and nod. “I suppose.”
Baz takes Hayden’s hand and leads him out. I turn back to Lola, knowing her radar has detected conflict and she’s not going to let it go. “I’m in timeout with Asher.”
She sighs. “What happened?”
I feel that same nervous feeling creeping up. “I think if I tell you, I'll be in timeout with you too.”
She raises one perfectly manicured, blond eyebrow. “Well, now I have to know.” She smiles. “It can’t be that bad.”
“I love Asher.”
She laughs, but then rolls her eyes. “You told him again? What did the asshole say this time?”
He completely freaked out the last time. “That’s not why I'm in timeout. He’s actually handled that well.” I lock eyes with her. “I think he loves me too.”
“He definitely does.” She’s always one step ahead of all of us.
“But . . .” I fight through the nerves, “he’s holding back. It’s like he’s scared to be too happy.”
She nods her head sadly, obviously understanding that well. “I get that.”
“I know you do.” I look out the window overlooking the pool and then turn back to Lola. “I think he needs to talk to Penelope—really talk to her. I think there was so much more to the story.”
“Penelope has taken the blame for a lot of things.”
“I may have said that it was never going to be any of you who ended up like your father,” my voice grows quieter, “that it would have been Colt, if anyone.”
Her jaw nearly drops, and her eyes widen. I see the pain written all over her face because she knows it’s true. “You said that to Asher?”
I nod once. “He doesn’t realize how good he is.”
“He never did.” She smiles sadly, playing with a new ring on her left finger that I'm just now seeing.
“Are you engaged?”
She smiles. “We have been for a while. It was always pending.”
I give her a knowing nod because they’ve been waiting for her life to feel in control. “I didn’t mean to cause more turmoil.”
“He’s ready to face that, I think, but he’s going to act out at first.”
“I’m strong enough to handle it.”
She smiles, standing from her chair and squeezing my shoulder. “I know you are. I think he is too. I can’t believe Colt was capable of being exactly like our father, but you’re right. Resentment and pressure can do horrible things to a person.”
Like making them cheat on their girlfriends with a girl he barely knew.
“I love Asher. I just want to see him heal.”
“I know, Viv. I know.” She smiles again, releasing my shoulder. “It’s going to be okay. Colt may have done some bad things, but he was good inside. He would want to see everyone happy.”
“Do you think he’ll talk to Penelope?”
She’s thinking it over, and then she shrugs. “I don’t know, but I'm not sure the answers will help all that much. You’ve already started to heal him, Viv. You know that.”
“He’s healed me.”
She smiled. “And that’s love, isn’t it? Fixing what’s broken inside a person by merely being there?”
Baz and Hayden come back into the kitchen, Baz ready for the day. I see Asher behind them, still glaring. Always the broody asshole.
But the man I love all in the same.
How the fuck can she say that about Colt? She didn’t even fucking know him. I mean, other than the one time they had sex.
I run my hand through my hair, sitting out by the pool. All I could think about all day was Viv and what she said, seething with rage all day long. Even the cute kindergartners couldn’t snap me out of my bad mood today.
We were doing well. Weren’t we? I mean, yeah . . . I can’t exactly tell her how I feel. And I'm sure that’s frustrating. But saying that about Colt?
The best man I ever knew. My brother who I miss every single day of my life. Who is gone. She said he would have turned out like my dad, the man I despise more than anyone.
“What are you doing out here?” I look up at Linc, who I didn’t even hear approaching.
“I’m staying here. What are you doing at Lola’s? You have your own house.”
He nods his head, grinning as he takes a seat next to me. Clearly, he isn’t going anywhere. “Lola told me about what Vivienne said.”
What the fuck? Everyone has already talked about this? Is nothing private now?
I turn to look over my shoulder toward the house. I didn’t eat here tonight. I needed space and stayed in my classroom for hours after school let out. Then I went and grabbed something to go before I sat in my car and ate it.
I face Linc, a cold bitterness in my tone. “She’s fucking wrong.”
“Is she?” I stare at him even more pissed-off.
“Yes. He was the best one, and you fucking know it.”
He scratches his chin, approaching me with caution, which annoys me. “He was. He will always be, but Ash, he did some fucked-up shit there at the end.”
“Like none of us have ever fucked up?” I stand from the chair, my fists clenching and unclenching at my sides as I whirl around to face Linc again. “We all have fucked up multiple times. There’s no way he would have been anything like dad and for her to suggest that . . .”
I can barely breathe as he stands, calmly walking over to me. “I don’t think he would ever have been exactly like our father, and Viv doesn’t either.”
“Oh? You talked to her?”
He shakes his head and braces his hands on my shoulders. “No. But I know what she means. We were all afraid we were going to turn into that motherfucker. So afraid, we made sure we didn’t, but Colt . . .”
“Colt. The fucking perfect one, Linc.” It’s like I'm desperately begging him to be on my side.
“Maybe our father was like that once too. I don’t know, and I don’t fucking care. All I know is Colt was struggling hard before he died. He had so much guilt. Guilt I didn’t understand until Viv showed up on my porch with Baz.”
“Yeah well, you know all about guilt.”
It’s low, but I can’t pretend Linc hasn’t done anything shitty. He fucked his brother’s girl. “Yeah. I do. I definitely do, and I'll gladly let you hate me for the rest of my life before I say anything bad about Colt, but no one is perfect. No. One.”
What the fuck is he saying?
“How could she have said that?”
His head swivels to look toward the house before meeting my eyes again. “She loves you.”
I scoff and push his hands away. “She loves me so fucking much that she wants to make me believe that Colt was anything less than perfect?”