“Sure...” He murmured then glanced over his book. “What the hell, Casper!” He screamed as he threw it across the bed and it bounced off. “I thought I could trust you to work unsupervised for a few hours,” he complained as he rolled and was reaching for his bag as he crossed the floor. “Let’s see how many stitches this is going to need.”
“Sorry, I cut myself,” Casper explained feebly as he followed and dropped the crutch once he reached the desk. Hawk looped an arm around Casper’s waist and lifted him without asking and it had its usual effect. Casper’s tongue became too thick and his hands were slick as Hawk leaned around him to turn on the lamp. Their chests and arms touched and Casper’s eye clung to Hawk’s face as he moved things out of the way so he could work.
“What did you do?” Hawk grumbled as he tipped Casper’s face back and toward the lamp.
“I cut myself,” he whispered and his eyelid shut as he tasted Hawk’s breath. Their lips were so close... If I leaned just a little closer I might be able to say it was an accident.
“I can see that. How?” Hawk asked.
“With a scalpel,” Casper offered and Hawk stepped back so he could glare at him.
“Thanks. I was afraid you managed this with the tongs but you put that to rest. How did you cut yourself with the scalpel?”
“Like this,” Casper said and dragged his fist over the dripping gash.
“Why?!” Hawk hissed as he grabbed Casper’s wrist.
“Oh,” he realized and shrugged. “I wanted to ask you something,” he said and clenched his fist as his courage crumbled. Get it over with or you’ll never stop thinking about it!
“What...? You don’t have to do that. Just ask if you have a question, silly,” he said under his breath as he went back to carefully inspecting Casper’s brow and he was close again. I like when he calls me silly, Casper thought as he shut his eye and inhaled Hawk’s scent. I don’t.
“I don’t care,” Casper breathed and gathered up what was left of his brain and his courage. “I heard what you said to the pretty house boy,” he said quietly.
“Matteo?”
“Probably.”
“House boy makes him sound like a servant and feels kind of racist. He’s the groundskeeper’s nephew and he’s studying art with Elliot,” Hawk scolded.
“I don’t think I could care less,” Casper replied, making Hawk chuckle.
“What about Matteo?” He asked then held a bottle up in warning before he rinsed the slice. “God only knows what was on that blade...”
“Nothing. It was new,” Casper said shakily. He sniffed hard and held on tight to the edge of the desk but he wasn’t that bothered as his forehead screamed.
“What did you want to know about Matteo, if you don’t care about who he is or what he does?” Hawk repeated so Casper held onto Hawk’s hand and took one last breath before he took the plunge.
“You told him you’re trying celibacy for a while but I was hoping... I mean, I wondered if it might be possible...” His voice broke and Casper swore as his head dropped and he hunted for the other half of the speech he prepared.
“Casper?” Hawk hooked his finger under Casper’s chin and tilted it back. “Are you asking me to have sex with you?” He asked gently as he searched Casper’s face and he felt even more hideous and like a complete fool. He’s too kind to laugh at you but you’re still a fool.
“I just thought...” Casper rasped then turned his face away so Hawk wouldn’t have to look at the wretched side as he politely rejected him. “I just thought that if there was a way you didn’t have to see me or touch me while we were doing it, you might not mind too much,” he said and made himself ashamed as well.
“Mind?” Hawk said as his hand slid around the unblemished side of his jaw and held Casper so he could trap his gaze. “Why wouldn’t I want to see you or touch you?” He asked as he stepped between Casper’s thighs. He rested his forehead on Casper’s and shushed him when he started to argue. “I told you, nothing about you scares me. I don’t see something ugly when I look at you.”
“But I’m not beautiful like Matteo,” he confessed, adding jealousy to the pile.
“Who?” Hawk angled his head and Casper gasped as their lips touched. “Shhhh...” Hawk’s hand curved around Casper’s throat and everything in his head stopped. Hawk’s tongue traced Casper’s lower lip and everything screamed again as it passed over the puckered corner. “Relax,” Hawk panted against Casper’s tongue and there was a new pain. It swelled from Casper’s core and yearned for relief as he waited for Hawk to kiss him. His lips dragged along Casper’s cheek and for a moment, he thought Hawk changed his mind and whimpered. “This doesn’t bother me,” Hawk whispered before the searing heat of his tongue washed up Casper’s scarred cheek, stunning him and forcing tears from his eye. Hawk licked the chemical burn away and left a new, more beautiful burn and Casper was afraid he wouldn’t be able to hate his face in the morning.
“Hawk... Please!” Casper reached for him and sobbed as their lips crashed. Hawk’s tongue tangled with Casper’s and it was like swallowing heaven. Casper moaned and gripped at his shoulders and arms urgently.
“Easy!” Hawk laughed but it was ragged as his hands glided down Casper’s back.
“I’m scared you’ll come to your senses and change your mind,” he said and tried to hide his face again but Hawk swore as he pulled Casper against him and lifted him off the desk.
“Do you think I haven’t thought about this? It’s all I think about when I’m not pissed off at you for hurting yourself or worried you’re doing something dangerous,” he growled as he easily lowered Casper onto Hawk’s bed. He sat up and pulled his shirt over his head and Casper’s hand clapped over his mouth as a startled cackle burst from him. This can’t be happening!
“There’s no way this is real,” he said and stuck his finger into the cut on his forehead and shrieked as he twisted.
“Stop!” Hawk slapped his hand away and fell forward so he could kiss Casper.
“I thought this might have been a dream,” he said then gasped again as Hawk found Casper’s hand and guided it to the bulge in his jeans. He was hard and pulsing as he cupped Casper’s hand and ground against it.
“I’ve had some dreams that started like this. Want me to show you how they usually go?” He panted as his tongue flicked at Casper’s.
“Yes! Do whatever you want to me!” Casper begged and bucked impatiently. Hawk growled as his lips slid over the rippled skin on Casper’s cheek. His tongue swept over the melted curl of Casper’s ear and the nerves were so excruciatingly sensitive, a cascade of shivers poured down his back. Casper laughed as he tentatively set his hand on Hawk’s back. “You’re so beautiful and strong. This doesn’t make sense,” Casper babbled as he offered his ear and his neck to Hawk’s wicked lips and tongue. His brain reeled all over again at the thought of baring the monstrous parts of himself to Hawk.
“You’re....creepy,” Hawk purred against Casper’s jaw before his teeth scraped.