It was a hot summer day. I remember the year like it was yesterday. 2002. I had just finished secondary and was about to celebrate my sixteenth birthday — my official introduction to becoming young lady, so I thought. I had decided to go to Birmingham city centre to find something to wear. Chanel and I decided that we were going to an under eighteen’s rave called ‘Cookies and Cream’. Everyone was going to be at Cookies and Cream and I had been crushing hard on a guy called Simon. He was three years older than me. He was nineteen, with dimples, and the realist swag that I had ever seen on a white boy. I was attracted to his blue eyes and his confidence. Tonight was the night that he would notice me, therefore, my outfit had to stand out. I had to get his attention at all costs.
I decided on a corset dress that was latex and figure hugging that would show off my diamond figure. I must admit for a fifteen-year-old, I had a grown woman’s body and I loved it. Simon would be the perfect birthday gift for me.
The day of the rave came. I was excited and it was my birthday. My nan had cooked a big feast for me and Chanel. Nan had made rice and peas with curried goat and home-made coleslaw, followed by apple pie. Mmmmmmm, my nan’s apple pie was like heaven in my mouth. See I am a secret foodie. I will admit I love me some good home-made cooking.
Chanel loved my nan’s cooking, and was forever complimenting my nan on her skills in the kitchen. Chanel and I decided that we would do the washing up after my nan had done all the cooking. Chanel was staying at my house tonight and we decided that we would catch the bus to the rave. Summer nights were the best for public transport. The weather was hot.
I must admit that Chanel and I were looking hot and ready to crush some hearts tonight. We arrived at the rave at seven p.m. See, the rave was seven to one a.m. and we didn’t want to miss out on anything plus our favourite DJ was playing ‘Real as Ice’ and ‘Crazy Birds’.
Chanel was wearing a yellow pencil skirt and a yellow crop top with white Reebok Classics. I had decided to wear my Adidas All Stars with my dress and our hair was in a simple bun with lip gloss. Looking back on it now, what was I thinking wearing Adidas trainers with a corset dress, but fashion back then was very simple for a teenager. Everything we wore was with trainers.
The rave was live. When we finally got in. The bouncers were acting like straight dicks at the door — had us queuing for an hour. First point was toilets to check that my hair was still neat and my outfit still looked FLY. I did the once over in the mirror and I was ready to get me a drink, ‘coke’, and get my dancing on tonight, the official turn up for my sixteenth birthday.
I was enjoying the night dancing away when I noticed Simon in the corner talking to a dark-skinned girl. She wasn’t even nice. That had completely ruined my night. I was ready to leave…
‘Chanel, you ready to leave?’
‘Davina, chill. Why you ready to leave? I’m not ready yet — in an hour’
‘Chanel, I’m ready to leave now. Remember you’re staying at mine, so let’s go.’
I was over this rave now. As we were leaving, Simon approached me.
‘Hey, you’re Davina, right?’
‘Yeah, why?’
‘Well I wanted to chat to you. Can I have your number?’
‘Ok, 07746933511.’
OMG… I can’t believe he actually noticed me and knew my name. This was my lucky night. I was on cloud nine I couldn’t stop smiling. Chanel was not impressed with me and was actually very annoyed that we had left early. I can admit when I was wrong and apologized to my friend,
‘Chanel, bestie, do you forgive me? I’m sorry for making us leave early.’
‘Davina, you’re such an ass at times. I was really having a good time and you had to ruin it.’
‘Chanel, seriously, I’m sorry. I will make it up to you. Come and give me hug.’
‘Gosh, you’re so annoyin.’
As hard as Davina tried, she could never stay mad at me and that is why we are best friends. Sometimes I act out without thinking and I need to learn to consider other people’s feelings.
I spent most of the night daydreaming about Simon and forever checking my phone, waiting on Simon to call or text. Well he didn’t call that night. I was wondering what he was up to. To say I was obsessed was an understatement — I was in love with that boy and he didn’t know yet. He was going to be mine at all costs. We are going to get married and I will be MRS… Hold up, I don’t even know his surname! There I go again getting ahead of myself. ‘Side note, girl you need to learn play it cool.’
Waiting on Simon to call was so excruciating. It took him over a week to call me. It was late Thursday night around eleven p.m. I got a call from a number that was not familiar.
‘Hi, who is this?’
‘Hi, Davina, it’s Simon what you up to?’
I wanted to scream. Finally he had called. I had to play it cool — I couldn’t let him know that I was eager!
‘Nothing, just chilling watching TV. You?’
‘Same. Just chilling with my boys. About to make some moves, so what you doing tomorrow?’
‘Nothing, why?’
‘Wanna chill or something?’
‘Yeah, sure, why not.’
‘OK, I will give you a call tomorrow around two p.m. Bye.’
‘Bye.’
See, my first warning sign was when Simon said he was about to make ‘moves’. I didn’t question or even pay attention to that statement. However, I would soon find out that Simon was into many illegal activities that would land him in jail over our fifteen-year relationship.
Also ladies, if a man calls and says do you wanna chill as a first date, the instant response is no. If he doesn’t come correct on the phone than he’s not worth your time. Some of you will say I'm harsh. However, first impressions last forever. Think about it!
My first advice would be look out for the warning signs early on. Don’t act blind to it, ladies and gentleman! Always pay attention to their actions and their words. LOVE will have you acting like a fool.
Date Night
It’s been there months now that I have been dating Simon with no official date night. We normally just hang at my house or we hang in his car. I want there to be more substance to our relationship so I kindly brought it up one day when we were having a random conversation.
‘Simon, do you like hanging out with me?’
‘Yeah, I like hanging with you, Dee. Why?’
‘So how come we haven’t been out on a proper date yet?’
‘Dee, I’m not into all that bullshit, I’m chilled. I can’t be caught slipping.’
‘Simon, what do you mean that you can’t be caught slipping? What do you do exactly?’
‘Dee, don’t worry. Anything for you, babe, I will take you to Burger and Lobster — that will be our date night.’
See, right there, I missed another warning sign. Instead of Simon answering the question, he pacified me by giving me what I wanted. I was so naïve and too caught up in my own fantasy world that I ignored another warning sign right before my eyes.
‘I was a fool for love.’
Simon decided that he was taking me to Burger and Lobster. I wouldn’t really call that a romantic date but beggars can’t be choosers. I’m just happy that we are finally going out. Simon came to get me around seven p.m. I was dressed casually. I had on denim skinny-fit jeans with a fitted t-shirt and black Reebok Classic trainers. I decided to put my hair in a ponytail and lip gloss on my lips. See, I dressed simple but my outfits always showed off my curves.